For behold, it is not meet that I should command in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant; wherefore he receiveth no reward.
Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness;For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in no-wise lose their reward. (D&C 58:26-18.)
I have wanted to serve a mission since I was very young. I love missionary work, and it has always been one of my lifetime goals. But, as the time drew closer, I found myself in a situation that made it very difficult to know if a mission was really what the Lord wanted me to do.
I was working for the Commission on the Bicentennial of the U.S. Constitution in Washington, D.C, and loved my job very much. However, I wanted to serve a full-time mission. So I continued with my plans and received a mission call to the Haiti Port-au-Prince Mission.
For months before and after receiving my call, I felt uncertainty to whether I was doing the right thing. Even after entering the Missionary Training Center, I felt a guilt that perhaps my motives were selfish.
I spent hours in sincere prayer to know if my decision was right. As the time drew closer to depart from the training center, my prayers became more fervent. I needed to know.
Only a few days before my flight to Haiti, I was studying in the Doctrine and Covenants, in Section 58. As I read verses 26-28, tears filled my eyes. The Spirit bore witness to me that this was the answer to my prayers. I was an "agent" unto myself, and my decision was not wrong.
Peace filled my heart. And, although my mission has not been easy, I've always had that experience to look back on and hang on to. I'll never forget the way this scripture touched my heart.