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DEAR ABBY: How important is it for a teenager to keep her room clean? We have a teenage daughter who is a slob, but otherwise she's a good kid. The condition of her room is the only thing my husband and I ever fight about.

I say her room is her business, and if the way she keeps it bothers him, he should stay out of there. He says, "As long as she's living in `our' house, we have a right to insist on a clean room."What is your opinion? - A DISAGREEMENT IN DULUTH

DEAR DISAGREEMENT: First, let's define our terms. What do you mean by "clean?" Free of dirt and pollution? Or simply a reasonably neat and orderly room?

I do not advocate a daily white glove inspection; neither would I tolerate apple cores, banana peels and empty soft drink cans setting around waiting for ants (or worse) to schedule a national convention.

Even though it's her room, it's in your house, and you have a right to insist on reasonable standards of orderliness and sanitation.

P.S. It's all well and good to say, "Let her live in the nest she has fouled," but when the nest is in your tree, that's a bird of another feather.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 33-year-old male, 6 feet tall, weight 190. I am in excellent physical condition, and I'm told that I am very good-looking. I am gay - but that's not my problem.

My problem is what to tell people (obviously people who don't know me very well) when I'm asked, "How come an attractive man like you isn't married?"

If I say (which I have), "I guess maybe I just haven't met the right person yet," they say, "Oh, have I got a girl for YOU!"

Obviously, I am not interested in meeting the girl they have in mind, and I don't want to go through that routine of taking a phone number or giving anybody mine.

Any suggestions? I'm not a very good liar. - GARY (NOT MY REAL NAME)

DEAR GARY: Since you're basically a truthful person - how about this: "I appreciate your interest, but I'm gay." They will probably think you're kidding - even though there's a 10 percent chance that you're kidding on the square.

DEAR ABBY: You said it was improper for a person to pencil in "and guest" on the response card accompanying a wedding invitation. This really hit home with me and many of my co-workers. One of the girls at work is getting married soon, and a lot of hard feelings have been incurred by just such a situation.

The married co-workers may bring their spouses, but we single ones have not been given the privilege of inviting a guest. This is very unfair.

Most of us are single or divorced, and it's no fun going alone when couples are present. We singles have to sit together in a little group hoping some man will be brave enough - or feel sorry enough for us - to ask us to dance. Meanwhile, all our married co-workers are dancing every dance and having a ball. Waiting to be "picked up" isn't any fun either.

We hope you will see our point and print this. Sign us . . . THE SINGLE ONES

DEAR SINGLE ONES: I do. And I did.

C) 1989 Universal Press Syndicate