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DEAR ABBY: Two years ago I married a 24-year-old man. I was 34. The age difference didn't matter because he seemed so mature and I loved him. We had a baby a year after we were married because we both loved children.

He worked for a company 84 miles away, and I know he could have worked closer to home. He's a well-trained professional, but he stayed on that job, commuting every day. He didn't even try to get a job closer to home.I got a phone call one evening that explained everything. An unidentified man called and told me my husband was having an affair with a woman he worked with, and said, "He's with her right now" - and he gave me her address.

I bundled up the baby, got into my car and drove to the "other woman's" house. Sure enough, my husband's car was parked in front! I rang the doorbell, but she wouldn't open the door.

I waited outside, and 30 minutes later my husband came out with his head down. We drove home in separate cars. That night we had a long talk, and he promised he would never see her again. (He had been seeing her since before we were married.)

I gave him another chance, and so far when he comes home, he stays home. He says he loves me - and me alone - but I still don't trust him, and my heart is heavy. When he makes love to me, I think he's thinking of her. I guess I really haven't forgiven him.

I suggested we get counseling. He said it would be a waste of time and money because he has no intention of seeing this woman again. I am going crazy with this on my mind. I've kept this bottled up inside me because I don't want my family to give me any advice on what to do - which would probably be to throw him out.

What should I do? - BROKENHEARTED

DEAR BROKENHEARTED: You were very wise to suggest counseling. Insist upon it. If your husband refuses to go for counseling, go without him at first. You need to learn how to resolve your hurt and anger in order to truly forgive him. And he needs to forgive himself if you both sincerely want to save your marriage.

Because your husband had been seeing this woman before he married you, there obviously still was a strong bond between them. Counseling is the way to go. Not seeking counseling would be expecting a deep wound to heal without thoroughly cleansing it. I wish you well and admire your mature attitude.

DEAR ABBY: Being a registered nurse, I read with interest about the lady who was short one pill (barbituate) twice in a row at the same pharmacy. When she counted the pills and found she had been shorted, she complained and was told, "The pill-counting machine must have been acting up."

While pill-counting machines can "act up," and most professionals are honest, the thought occurred to me that if someone chose to "short" many prescriptions, he or she could be building a personal supply.

Thanks, Abby, for reminding all of us to count our medications - especially narcotics and barbituates. The implications could go far beyond money. - DEANN MILLER, R.N., ATLANTA

CONFIDENTIAL TO HEARTBROKEN PARENTS: Please equip your child to be as independent as possible in the sightless years that lie ahead. As John Milton so wisely said, "It is not miserable to be blind; it is miserable to be incapable of enduring blindness."

Everything you'll need to know about planning a wedding can be found in Abby's booklet, "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send your name and address plus check or money order for $2.89 ($3.39 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054. (Postage is included.)