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DEAR ABBY: After reading the letter from the woman who was insulted because she was addressed by her first name at her doctor's office while the men were called "Mister," I wish to relate the following incident:

After being kept waiting for more than 30 minutes in my doctor's examining room (I was there for a breast examination following my second mammogram within four months), I heard the nurse say to the doctor, "The `ear' is in room nine, and the `boobs' are in here!"I could write pages on how that made me feel in an already stressful situation. I addressed her remark the minute the nurse and doctor entered the room. From the nurse, who first denied saying it, I got a mumbled, "Sorry." From my doctor I received, "I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it."

I'm not a prude, Abby, and I'm not naive. But to be referred to as a body part - in a crude slang term - does not elicit a lot of faith in that group of so-called professionals. I am finding it difficult to go back there, although our insurance dictates whom we see. - FUMING IN TUCSON

DEAR FUMING: The nurse was insensitive and unprofessional, and the doctor was no bargain either. Contact your insurance company and ask if there is another physician's group you may consult for a "second opinion." With nine examination rooms, a 30-minute backlog, and a nurse with the hide of a rhinoceros and a limited medical vocabulary, your physician already has more problems than he can handle.

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I purchased a home in a rural community. Our house in the city has not yet sold. We borrowed money from both our parents to purchase our new home, promising to repay them when our old house sells.

Last Christmas, my husband's parents presented us with our gift - a note that showed our loan status to the penny, of which they deducted $1,000. Other family members who did not owe them money received $1,000 per family.

We are grateful for the reduction of our loan, but after receiving the note, we didn't feel much like celebrating.

What do you think of this kind of present? So far, my parents have never reminded us of how much we owe. - I.O.U. IN IOWA

DEAR I.O.U.: No matter how you look at it, you received a gift worth $1,000, so as I see it, you have no reason to complain.

DEAR ABBY: I am 27 years old. When I was in the second semester of my senior year of high school, I was raped. I couldn't face my classmates, so I dropped out of school.

I returned the following year to graduate in 1982, although I was ready to graduate in 1981. My picture was already in the 1981 yearbook, and my name had even been printed in the 1981 graduation booklet. All of my friends graduated in 1981.

The Class of '81 is now planning its 10th reunion, and I feel that this is the gathering I should attend. However, technically, I didn't graduate until 1982.

Should I go to the party with all of the classmates with whom I should have graduated? Or should I wait a year and probably not attend because I don't know any people from that class? Please don't use my name. - UNDECIDED

DEAR UNDECIDED: Go with the Class of '81. (Would I lie to you on George Washington's birthday?)

Everything you'll need to know about planning a wedding can be found in Abby's booklet, "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada), to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054. (Postage is included.)