This is what the new leaders of whatever is left of the Soviet Union face. For 70 years the country was run by fat, old, tired men who had risen through Communist Party ranks espousing an economic system that didn't work. Whenever anyone complained, he was arrested as an enemy of the state and dealt with in an unkind manner.
Here's why communism didn't work.Buglatov was in charge of building a new apartment house called Molotov Gardens on the outskirts of Moscow.
It was almost completed when someone pointed out to him that it needed wooden floors.
"How stupid of me!" exclaimed Buglatov. "I was studying so hard for my party exams that I forgot the floors. I will call the Leningrad People's Floor Company and order 500 for the building."
Buglatov made the call and said, "Comrade, I have good news for you. I want 500 floors for my apartment house."
"No problem. We will ship them to you in 1999."
"Are you crazy? I need them right away. There are 1,500 families waiting to move in, not counting their in-laws."
"You have to have a Red Flag priority permit to get them before 1995. We're shipping all our floors to Michnishinsky in the Crimea for a dacha he is building there for his family. As you know, Michnishinsky is a member of the Central Committee and you don't say no to him when he asks for floors."
Buglatov said, "But I have to open Molotov Gardens on time, or I will be criticized by the party's Five-Year Production Committee."
"Pay them off."
"With what?"
"Promise all their relatives apartments."
"Comrade, all my apartments have already been promised to the relatives of Communist Party big shots."
"That was a mistake. When you bribe bureaucrats in this country you always keep something for the ones you will need later."
"What would it take for you to give me the floors?"
"A home in California, a trip to Paris, a summer on the Riviera. I'm very easy to please."
"You are also a disgrace to Lenin, Marx and Engels. How can we bury capitalism when our economic system is rife with bribery and corruption?"
"Don't ask me, I only make floors."
"I have a good mind to call up the Kiev Woodworks and give them the order."
"You can call if you want to, but they are making a big sailboat for Suslov, the local party chief there."
"Comrade, I am sure that there's something you need in Moscow that I can find for you if you will ship me my floors."
"There is. Would you send a case of anchovies?"
"Are you insane? There are no anchovies in Moscow, and no one knows if there ever will be again. Where am I going to find anchovies?"
Buglatov said, "In the same place where I am going to find your floors."