If Congress were thinking, it would combine the health-care and crime bills so it would be illegal to make the American people sick by arguing over legislation this long.

- It's no surprise Roger Altman is resigning. The alternative seemed to be to change his name to Faultman.- Saugerties, N.Y., the little town where the Woodstock '94 rock festival was held, got a lot of money out of the deal. Bet it needs to be laundered.

- "This is the greatest country in the world," the president says, "and none of us would live anywhere else for anything." Hold on. We haven't yet heard any offers.