Ivana and Donald? Chump change. Imagine if the Jackson and Presley lawyers hunkered down to work out what one divorce lawyer called "the mother of all pre-nuptial agreements."
OK - Michael keeps the llamas. Lisa Marie gets all furniture from the Jungle Room. Every pair of gloves is equally divided: Michael gets the right one, Lisa Marie the left."He's worth $100 million at least," said renowned New York divorce lawyer Raoul Felder, as visions of the Neverland-Graceland merger danced in his head. "It's a conglomerate. THEY'RE a conglomerate."
There's the Jackson fortune: An estimated income of $67 million from 1991-93, according to Forbes magazine. His huge California estate. His ownership of the publishing rights to the Beatles' songs.
And there's the Presley estate, which has increased 20 times in value since Elvis left it all to his only child in 1977. The centerpiece of the $100 million King's ransom is Graceland, a moneymaker that draws tourists the way a peanut butter and banana sandwich attracted Elvis.
There's no word on any such agreement between the King of Pop and the daughter of the King, but, hey, a lawyer can dream.
What about Lisa Marie's kids, 5-year-old Danielle and 20-month-old Benjamin? Who gets Macaulay Culkin? And where does Emmanuel Lewis fit in?
The couple confirmed their marriage on Monday, announcing they were hitched 11 weeks ago in the Dominican Republic. It was the first marriage for Jackson, 35, and the second for the 26-year-old Lisa Marie.
Outside the Trump Tower, where the newlyweds continued to keep a low profile Tuesday, the curious offered instant psychoanalysis of this match made in dys-func-tional heaven.
"They're two weird people, from two screwed-up public families, so they probably shared something in common," offered Evan Brett, 21, who came in from Long Island to stake out the couple.
The crowd - packed with people waving autograph books, cameras and video cameras - grew restless as it became obvious Michael and his bride were not leaving the building.
At one point, they booed an exiting Donald Trump, upset that he wasn't a Jackson or a Presley or a Presley-Jackson.