YOU REMEMBER Narcissus, the character from Greek mythology who fell in love with his own reflection in a pond? That same tendency is back. It has to be one of the reasons that increasing numbers of men are obsessed enough with their body images that they go the gym every day.
They want to look great.I don't mean to imply that my son, David, recently returned from an LDS mission in Tahiti, is like Narcissus.
But before he left, he built a well-toned, muscular, admirable frame through rigorous sessions at the gym. In fact, he was in such good shape that he didn't even slip that much while he was away.
Now he is interested in getting back into top form. Shouldn't take him too long.
As for me, I'm at that dangerous, middle-aged position when everything starts to sag. I find myself worrying that paunchiness will set in.
Who knows? When I get a little older, I could look like Winston Churchill, Ernest Hemingway, Orson Welles or Alfred Hitchcock.
Don't worry. I'm not crazy enough to think I can look like Arnold Schwarzenegger, no matter how much iron I pump.
But I persuaded Dave to introduce me to his lifting program and give me some pointers before he went back to college. Take me with him so I can pump some iron and build some muscle tone - get a "body by Dave."
I figured it would be preferable to having the flab pumped out through a liposuction tube.
He kindly and patiently instructed me on the machines I could use to build my chest, triceps, biceps, shoulders, back, calves, etc. He took me through them slowly, selecting the lighter weights on each machine and carefully monitoring my activity.
In short, he acted as my personal trainer.
While I was learning the meaning of doing four sets and 10-12 reps, he was solicitous of my well being. "Is that OK, Dad? Is it comfortable? Is it too heavy?"
Pretty soon I was doing the bench press, the military press, the hamstring curls, the calf raises, the close-grip-seated-cable-pull-downs and the two-arm straight back curl.
Dave suggested I work out three days a week for at least an hour each day. But he warned me of common mistakes made by novices like me - getting "carried away" by lifting too much too soon or stretching too much and injuring the joints.
He recalled injuring his own back when he started.
I watched him work one machine, then I tried to repeat what I had seen - carefully. I had no desire to suffer a weight-lifting injury and have to explain to my colleagues the next day, "I injured myself last night trying to develop a great set of pecs."
So when Dave said one machine would work my lower back, I took it easy on that one. But I worked my arms and legs enough that I could feel the stiffness the next day.
When we left the weight room, I noticed beads of perspiration all over Dave's head.
As for me, I never even broke a sweat.
But hey, no use overdoing it the first day. I'll take it slowly. I was even careful of the stair climber and the running track - although I kept setting the track so high I couldn't keep up with it.
"Help - how do you stop this thing?"
I just couldn't get it slow enough to suit me.
When I got home, I decided I've got a long road ahead. I anxiously looked at my reflection in the mirror and guess what?
Still no muscle tone.