Dear Abby: Which is correct: "I couldn't care less" or "I could care less"?

I have always said "I couldn't care less," meaning, "I could not care any less about it than I do now."However, I have heard many people say "I could care less," which means, "I could care a lot less about it than I do now."

Thanks for clearing this up.

- Caring in Arizona

Dear Caring: Oddly enough, "I could care less" and "I couldn't care less," while literally opposite in meaning, have come to suggest the same lack of interest. Most copy editors and grammarians, however, prefer "I couldn't care less."

If there is any question, there is nothing wrong with the time-honored expression, "I don't give a hoot."

Dear Abby: I am a 43-year-old male, an only child - the only one in my family able to carry on the family name.

My mother has been bugging me to get married since I was in my early 20s.

I have repeatedly asked her not to bring this subject up again, but she does anyway.

Her latest reason to nag me about my bachelor status is that her friends keep asking, "What is wrong with your son?" suggesting that maybe I don't like women.

Any ideas?

- Bugged in L.A.

Dear Bugged: Yes. Tell your mother to tell her friends that you like women so much you haven't decided which one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Dear Abby: May I respond to "Not Kidding in Knoxville, Tenn.," who was offended when a friend, on hearing that both his parents had died within two weeks of each other, said, "You're kidding!"

One afternoon in 1980, my father had a heart attack here in Phoenix. I went directly to the hospital. Later, I telephoned my brother, Ron, in New York to give him the news. He said he would catch the next flight to Phoenix.

Early the next morning, Dad died, so I called my brother at his office.

Me: It's over. Dad died at 6:40 a.m.

Ron: You're kidding!

Me: No, Ron. I'm not kidding.

Ron: I didn't mean it that way.

Abby, I knew that. I knew Ron was trying to get to Phoenix and was stunned by the suddenness of Dad's death, and was at a loss for words. It was probably a little wicked of me - but I had had a very long night. Years later, it is still an indelible memory for both of us.

A couple of years ago, my companion finally died of AIDS, peacefully, in our home. When Ron called, I told him.

Later, he told me that he had specifically avoided saying, "You're kidding!"

- Not Kidding in Phoenix

View Comments

Dear Readers: If you have warm feelings for felines, get "Dear Tabby" - a slim little volume with advice on love, life and the pursuit of mice. The author is Leigh W. Rutledge, the publisher is Dutton, and the price is $10.95 ($14.99 in Canada).

It is purrrrfectly delightful.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

1995 Universal Press Syndicate

Join the Conversation
Looking for comments?
Find comments in their new home! Click the buttons at the top or within the article to view them — or use the button below for quick access.