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BAD NEWS FOR HAMS

Trust the German sports authorities to brook no nonsense. They have suspended and fined all-star soccer player Andreas Moeller for taking a "dive" in a recent game.

A dive in soccer is when a player crashes to the ground, writhes in pain and otherwise engages in alarming histrionics, then, once medical personnel have been summoned, bounces up to resume play none the worse for wear. Basically, Moeller was punished for overacting.An overacting penalty should be in the arsenal of every American referee and umpire. A new symbol could be added to box scores: the ham.