The group of Australians sitting on the balcony of the Iguanas-Ranas Bar is getting the full Tijuana treatment.
The elderly and mostly off-key mariachi players are pounding guitars and blasting trumpets in their ears, the waiters are doing their heavy "South of the Border" schtick, empty tequila glasses are piled high on the table, salsa and chips are hip deep."You have come very far, amigos, to enjoy the joys of Mexico," the waiter tells the Aussies. "Bienvenido, and how 'bout another double margarita, the finest in all of the Baja, muchas gracias and Mexico loves Australia." He's good, he's very good; he does everything but a fiery Mexican hat dance right on the spot. If you're from California, it's pretty silly. If you're from Coober Pedy, Australia, you're eating it up.
It's low but lively theater, a textbook example of the gentle art of feeding and fleecing the thousands of gringos from all over the world who cross the Tamale Curtain every day to sample the frenzy of the world's busiest border town.
The heady days when Tijuana was a big-time sex mill and booze mecca, with real bad guys and one of the seediest reputations in the Americas, are long gone.
This is not to suggest that Tijuana has become a temple of virtue, because there are still plenty of rough edges to reach out and bite the unwary. But there is, naturally, a lot more going on in Tijuana than tourism.
The city - Mexico's fourth largest - is growing like a weed and the relaxation of trade barriers as a result of the North American Free Trade Agreement has resulted in a spate of new industries springing up in the Tijuana/Mexicali area of the Northern Baja.
And the traditional things that lure non-tourist, cost-conscious folks across the border are still in evidence: low-cost pharmaceuticals, automobile interior designs and repair, and dentistry.
But it's the hordes who pour onto the Avenida Revolucion every day, hell-bent on buying and/or drinking everything in sight, that are the fuel that still runs Tijuana's engine. The pathetic donkeys painted like zebras are still on street corners, waiting for folks to mount up and have their picture taken. Friendly shills are still standing outside leather goods shops trying to herd potential customers inside. Bars and restaurants are full. The streets are a sea of swarming taxicabs, and every third car has California plates, most from San Diego.
It's a zoo in Tijuana, and unless you are either A) a tequila/mariachi/bullfight/jai alai junkie, B) a first-time visitor to Mexico, or C) a shop-till-you-drop type, go elsewhere in the Baja to have fun. The city is too big, too crowded, too noisy and too smoggy.
Of course, you can enjoy the lures of Tijuana without staying in the city.
But if you're dead set on going to Tijuana, and maybe spending a night or two, note:
The hotel scene in the city is fairly bleak. The only five-star in town, the Grand Hotel Tijuana (formerly the Hotel Fiesta Americana), has all the charm of a giant mausoleum. Another old golf course area favorite, the Plaza Las Glorias (formerly the Radisson), is getting ragged around the edges. The El Conquistador, the Pueblo Amigo Holiday Inn and the downtown Best Western are OK, but nothing special.
Prices for good Tijuana hotels are often a steal, with room specials sometimes as low as $35-$40 a night. Because most of the trans-border tourists are day-trippers, there are many times of the year when the city's hotels are almost vacant.
- Hint: You can almost always get a better deal walking in off the street than pre-booking through a U.S. travel agent. The Plaza Las Glorias, for example, was going for $85 a night if pre-booked, $35 a night for walk-ins.
Restaurant fare in the city is generally very good and fairly inexpensive, another reason folks flock across the border for a day. One of the best, and liveliest, spots in town is Carnitas Uruapan on Diaz Ordaz Boulevard. There are usually some pickup mariachi groups wandering around and toward the shank of the evening, things get very friendly.
- Hint: If you have never summoned a mariachi group to your table to be serenaded, you should realize they expect to be paid for their efforts. About $5 for a couple of songs is about right, more if they do a really good job.
Sights? Not many. One of the best is the display of Mayan art and history at the Centro Cultural Tijuana at the Paseo de los Heroes and Avenida Independencia. The cultural center is part of a complex that also has an Omnimax theater showing interesting Mexican programs. It costs about 5 pesos (less than a dollar) to enter the cultural center.
Shopping, as noted, is centered on Avenida Revolucion, but is also lively a block over on Avenida Constitucion. The city is also building shopping malls at an alarming rate; many are empty at the moment and don't have much charm.
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ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
If you go . . .
Getting to Tijuana and getting around is easy and cheap - going into Mexico. Coming out is another story.
By foot, the easy way, get to the border, walk across into Mexico and grab a cab. The run down to Avenida Revolucion should be no more than about $5, the normal price for most trips around town. If you haven't tried it yet, hop the Tijuana Trolley at the Amtrak station in San Diego and ride it to the border. It costs about $1.75 one way.
If you're driving, make sure to have Mexican car insurance, available in San Diego or San Ysidro. It'll run something like $8-$10 a day depending on how long you plan to stay in Mexico. Driving in Tijuana is no worse than driving anywhere in Southern California, but parking, getting around and just trying to survive the traffic jams can drive you crazy.
It is no problem getting into Mexico through the San Ysidro crossing; coming out is a nightmare. To help alleviate the jams, another Tijuana-area customs crossing has been opened near the city's airport. It's called the Otay Mesa border crossing, and it links with Highway 117 in California, which runs west to Interstate 805 east of San Ysidro.
According to the Mexican Government Tourist Office in Los Angeles, U.S. citizens entering northwestern Sonora and all of Baja California are no longer required to obtain tourist cards. The Baja and the area of Sonora between Puerto Penasco and the Northern Baja border have been classified as "free zones." Car registration, driver's licenses and Mexican car insurance are all that is required.
It might be wise, however, to take along a copy of your birth certificate or your passport just in case - and also to prove U.S. citizenship.