Whining, defiant kids. A house full of piles of papers and stuff that has become a permanent fixtures.
An overdue bill - the check was written weeks ago but the bill never made it to the mailbox. A dining room table littered with three projects in the works that are not likely to be completed in this lifetime.And if that sounds bad, add the emotional stresses of premenstrual syndrome (PMS) or pregnancy to the jumble of attention deficit disorder and you've got the recipe for misery stew.
"You have two disregulated systems interacting with each other; hormonal and neurochemical," said Kathleen Nadeau, a Bethesda, Md. psychologist. "Having severe PMS is almost universal for women with ADD. Some women are almost unable to take care of their children during their premenstrual cycle."
Women with ADD may be hyperactive, such as Sara Gross who chatted nonstop with co-workers and couldn't sit at a desk long enough to hold down a job.
Or, they may be forgetful and dubbed "spacey." That's how Jo Dee Robertson thought of herself. As a schoolgirl, she couldn't remember what her homework was and when she did study, she went to school unable to recall what she had studied the night before. When she became a wife and mother, she sometimes forgot to pick up her kids from after-school activities. Once, she left a hot pan on the stove so long it became fused to the burner.
ADD, while recognizable in boys who can't sit still long enough to concentrate on much of anything, is often overlooked in girls who don't always show the hyperactive aspect, said Dr. Nadeau.
Society's expectations for women are especially hard on those with ADD, she said. Running a household and raising children require good organization and planning as well as attention to detail and patience, qualities that people with ADD have in short supply.
In the workplace, women have often been steered to clerical and support positions that require them to keep others organized. "Just the opposite of what they should be doing," said Dr. Nadeau.
Angela Tzelepis evaluates people of all ages at the ADHD Lifespan Center at Wayne State University in Detroit. An evaluation, which includes interviews with family members, costs about $500 and is not always covered by insurance.
Males appear to have ADD far more frequently than females, she said, but diagnostic information about the inattentive type of ADD, which affects more women, has only been available for a few years.
Moreover, women are more socialized to control their ADD-characteristics and usually work harder to sublimate traits such as blurting things out and being impatient, said Dr. Tzelepis.
"We all have hard times, but with ADD it's pervasive and life-long and across a variety of settings," she said.
(Distributed by Scripps Howard News Service.)