Dear Pat: I have discovered I may be developing more than friendly feelings for a longtime friend. What's worse, the guy she recently broke up with is also a close friend. It's a complication I don't need. It would help to see what one of your panels would recommend.
- `An Interested Reader'
Answer: From the student panelists of Sinton High School, Sinton, Texas: This is a problem that often occurs between friends. You are certainly not alone in your dilemma. We have come up with a few ideas, but remember, we don't know all the details of your situation.
First of all, you need to give your long-time "girl" friend some time to recuperate from her breakup. Continue being her friend, be sensitive. When you feel the time is right, drop hints about your feelings toward her. Pay close attention to her response. If she seems to feel the same way about you - take action. If not, continue being her friend, but lay off a "relationship" with her for now. Ignoring her because you are embarrassed usually makes matters worse.
As for your male friend, starting a relationship with his ex-girlfriend should not be a problem if he is a real friend. Understand that he, too, needs time to heal. But remember to trust your intuitions and have confidence. Communication is essential for any relationship to work.
Answer: From Pat Schudy: I hope the panel's suggestions help.
Readers: During a panel discussion about teenagers and sex, a high school student in the audience stood up and said in a frustrated voice to the adults on the panel: "Don't tell me what to do. What I want is information. Then I'll decide what to do."
Good information - about anything - can be hard to come by. So can the names and phone numbers of professional counselors or agencies who might be able to help with a particular situation. Sometimes they're listed in the phone book under a heading you'd never think of. Or there may not be an office in your town. Sometimes, I hear, no matter where you look, there's just no help available.
Whether you're a teenager or a parent, what's been your experience?
First name Age City, state .
During the past year, I wanted or needed to talk to someone about .
I had no idea who to talk to or where to go for help.
I looked in the phone book but couldn't find the name or number of an agency I thought could help.
I'd still like advice or information. Here's my situation or question: .
Send to Pat Schudy, "Let's Talk, c/o Universal Press Syndicate, 4900 Main Street, Kansas City, MO 64112.
What's up: Do you know:
1. Who said, "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee"?
2. What was Black Monday?
3. What country shares the eastern border of Tibet?
4. What was the Code of Hammurabi?
5. If The Doors and Led Zeppelin are both from the United States?
You'll find the answers in the High School Edition of "Culturescope: The Princeton Review Guide to an Informed Mind" (Random House Inc., 1995). Don't be put off by the title. It's sort of a trivia game in a book that you can read by yourself or play with others.
The book starts with a multiple-choice "Culturescope Quiz." Then it gives you the correct answers and lets you know how you scored in comparison with high school students throughout the country.
After that, there are more than 450 easy-to-read pages about American culture from the arts to sports. Each topic has multiple-choice questions and briefly explained answers. Almost every page has pictures, charts or graphs.
"Culturescope" makes it easy to learn facts that can help you on achievement tests or during college or job interviews. It costs $20 and is available at bookstores nationwide.
Here are the answers to the short quiz: 1. Boxer Muhammed Ali; 2. Oct. 19, 1987, the most severe stock market crash since 1929; 3. China; 4. One of the oldest, most complete recorded systems of law; 5. No, Led Zeppelin is from Great Britain.