Here's another name you can add to the list of things that help children do well in school: grandparents.
According to a couple of recent surveys conducted by the National Association of Elementary School Principals and World Book Educational Products, both principals and grandparents feel they can make a big difference by paying more attention to their grandchildren's education.Of all the ways grandparents can help, the surveys found five ways to have the most significant influence on school success. Whenever possible, grandparents should:
- Attend the grandchild's school functions and meet the teachers.
- Demonstrate interest in each grandchild's school progress.
- Take the grandchild to cultural and community activities.
- Talk about the role of education in their grandchild's future plans.
- Select educational gifts, such as books, games, globes, microscopes, etc.
Using the survey findings as a basis, NAESP and World Book have developed a program to help grandparents get involved. Called "The Apple of Your Eye," the program focuses on five areas:
A - Ask.
P - Praise.
P - Participate.
L - Learn.
E - Encourage.
The apple program can help grandparents and grandchildren whether they share the same home or neighborhood or whether they live hundreds of miles away, says Samuel G. Sava, executive director of NAESP. Long-distance grandparents may have more of a challenge, but there are still things they can do. Here are some suggestions from the program:
ASK
One easy way to help grandchildren succeed in school is just by asking them about school. By showing an interest in the child's work, you are letting him or her know that it is important.
- Be specific. Ask specific questions about school: What was the best thing that happened this week? What books are you read-ing?
- Keep up-to-date. Ask grandchildren to keep you informed. Get them to show or tell you about things they're proud of: art, a geography project, a report card.
- Grandparent to parent. Ask parents where, when and how you can be the most helpful to them in supporting your grandchildren's education.
- That's entertainment: Talk about the books, movies and TV shows you share with your grandchildren. Ask what their favorite parts were, what might happen next, or what, if anything, they'd change.
- Problem solvers: Ask questions and pose situations that help children solve problems. Ask for suggestions and opinions, such as what to cook, where to go. Talk with them about news or family events. Listen to and discuss their ideas.
- Be alert: Ask if there are any school subjects or concepts they're having trouble understanding. Some kids find it easier to open up to grandparents. If so, quietly let parents know that they need to give some extra attention.
- Write often: Invite them to be your pen pals, even if you live next door! Pass along a surprise every once in a while - a joke, cartoon, trading card or treat. Writing helps them with reading, and every child loves receiving mail.
PRAISE
Self-confidence is very important in school. Confident children don't give up when an assignment is difficult. They're not afraid to raise their hands, ask questions or try again when they've made a mistake.
- Praise them often: When you praise your grandchildren for their good efforts, they'll feel like trying, learning and doing even more.
- Tell why: When your grandchildren do well, mention why you're proud of them. "I hear you did a great job on that science fair project." Compliments work best when they're about something specific.
- Don't compare: Praise children for what they do, not for how they compare to anyone else.
- Be sincere: Even very young children know when they deserve praise and when they don't. Congratulate your grandchildren when they have truly done well or worked hard on their schoolwork.
- Remind them of rules: Praise them for playing fair, being a good loser, behaving kindly or following rules at home and school.
- Try rewards: An occasional reward can be a great way to praise, especially if it's not expected. Send a note with a surprise enclosed, take them to get a treat, invite them on a special outing alone with you.
- Be overheard: Let them hear you saying something good about them to other people. Repeat compliments you hear about them.
- Look beyond sports: Try not to focus your praise only on athletic skills. Concentrate your compliments on ways they're improving their minds.
- Praise parents, too: Compliment your children, too. Let them know you're proud of the job they are doing as parents.
PARTICIPATE
Make the most of the opportunities you have to be with your grandchildren.
- Go to school: Attend open houses, games, plays, music programs and school fairs when you can. If you live out of town, try to time your visits around important school functions. And ask your grandchildren to show you their school, introduce you to their teachers and share their school calendars with you.
- Share your experiences: It may be possible to schedule a classroom visit to talk about your job, a favorite hobby, your heritage or your travels.
- Discover: See if the school hosts a special grandparents' day. If so, try to attend.
- Broaden their interests: Help them learn more about history, art, nature, dance, science and music. Teach them about some of your favorite hobbies: gardening, fishing, working with tools. Cook together using favorite family recipes.
- Volunteer: Children whose families participate in school are more successful than others. If you can, consider being a volunteer.
- Read together: Find time to read to them and have them read to you. Talk about the words and pictures. Ask questions about the story or characters. The more they read, the better readers they'll be.
- Joint efforts: Prompt the whole family to participate in activities. Point out family classes, events or TV programs. Look for ways to be together. Children thrive on adult attention.
LEARN
Children are born curious. Help keep that desire to learn alive by introducing them to new ideas, things, people and experiences.
- Good, better, best: Urge students to challenge themselves - in school and out. They more they try, the more they'll feel able to do.
- Individuality: Every child has his or her own way of learning things, doing things. Learn these differences so you can help in the best way. Ask teachers for advice.
- Education for life: When you're doing something with your grandchildren that uses math, science, reading or English, mention it to them. Get their help when you double a recipe. Ask an older child to help balance your checkbook.
- Tools for the job: Help make sure they have tools they need to learn - or know where to find them: paper, pencils, art supplies, a ruler, a library card, reference materials.
- Expand their horizons: Help them discover more about their interests, whether dinosaurs or space travel. Suggest books, videos, educational programs. Find places to visit.
- Explain mistakes: Help them realize that mistakes are part of learning. Talk together about what went wrong, and then urge them to try again. Share when you make a mistake, too. Children need to understand that learning from mistakes is a lifelong process.
ENCOURAGE
Children need to know that the people they love have faith in them. Encourage them to try their best at everything they do.
- Go to work: Talk about what they'd like to do "when they grow up." Encourage them to visit the work world they're interested in. If you work, invite them to stop by sometime so they can see what you do.
- I can! Whenever you hear your grandchild say "I can't," look for ways to show them they can. Encouragement may be all he or she needs.
- Discourage TV: Most children spend just minutes a day reading - and hours watching television. Look for other ways to spend your time together.
- Book 'em: Reading is terribly important for school success. Encourage reading by giving books or magazine subscriptions as gifts. Suggest they get and use library cards.
- Think about it: Help them to think things out. If they ask "What's that?" or "Why are you doing it that way?" turn the question around - "What do you think it is?"
- Show your confidence: Talk to them before a big test, performance or project. Encourage them to prepare, to do their best and to relax. Tell them you're confident they'll do well. Be sure to follow up afterward to see how it went.