The situation for the Jazz was summed up nicely some time in the second quarter when Karl Malone missed his fifth or sixth layup of the night - it could've been more; we lost count. As the referee blew the whistle to stop play for a foul, Malone caught the rebound with one big hand and stood there staring up at the basket.
Then he pulled the ball back, as if he were going to throw it at the backboard out of frustration. After a moment's hesitation, he thought better of it and flipped it to the official. Good thing he did, too.Malone never would have hit it. He was a good three feet away from the basket, and that just wasn't a good distance for him on this night. He needed to be much closer. He would have missed the whole thing and tattooed some poor bystander with SPALDING across the forehead.
"Why compound it by doing that?" Malone said later.
Precisely. On the worst shooting night in Jazz playoff history, who knows what might have happened. It might have landed in the cheap seats or knocked out a Laker Girl.
The Jazz lost 104-84 to the Lakers Thursday night in a spectacularly bad fashion, cutting their playoff series lead to 2-1. For a night, they shot like you and me. It was shooting so bad that it was remarkable.
The best shooting team in the NBA for three straight seasons made two of 22 shots in the first quarter, which is 9.1 percent. Give Ray Charles 22 shots, and he hits two of them. The bricks continued. Two of 26. Three of 32. Four of 37. Five of 41. During one stretch the Jazz went nearly 10 minutes without a field goal. In the first half they made six of 44 shots - 13.6 percent.
At halftime they dragged some guy out of the stands named Barry to shoot for prizes. Even Barry made six shots. Jerry Sloan tried to sign him on the spot.
The night's totals: The Jazz made 23 of 80 shots, or 28.8 percent. Without Jeff Hornacek (he made nine of 14 shots), the Jazz make only 14 of 66 shots. After a one-for-five first half, Hornacek made eight of nine shots in the third quarter; his teammates made one of 11.
Hornacek, explaining his nine attempts in one quarter, said he simply got good looks at the basket. He was just being diplomatic. Hornacek had a defender in his face on almost every attempt and still made impossible, quick-release, no-look shots. Pressed about this, Hornacek said, "I was taking shots I normally wouldn't. No one else seemed to be making them."
Karl Malone made two of his 20 shots. John Stockton zero of six. Greg Ostertag zero of three. Byron Russell two of 11. Gregi Foster zero of four. Antoine Carr two of seven.
Immediately after the game, the Jazz put out a missing persons report. In coaching parlance, they never showed up. Somewhere between LAX and the Marina Beach Marriott, the Jazz got lost.
"I'm really embarrassed for these guys," said Jerry Sloan, suck-ing on a cigarette in the locker room. It was the first time all night the Jazz had lighted up anything.
The good news was that the Jazz weren't shooting anything dangerous, such as darts or a golf ball, because somebody would've been hurt by all the errant shots. The Jazz set franchise playoff records for fewest field goals in a game, half and quarter, as well as worst field goal percentage for a half and quarter.
Except for Hornacek in the third quarter, the Jazz just didn't have it. None of them did, and that was the strange part. "We've had nights where one guy is struggling and then on other nights another guy is struggling, but never when everybody is struggling to make shots," said Malone.
Stockton's little spot-up shot failed. So did the Big Dawg's jump hook and baseline jumper. So did Foster's jump shot from the wing and Ostertag's jumper in the paint. Russell's shot from the corner refused to fall. Malone's reliable fadeaway jumper? Gone. But that isn't what really bothered him.
"I missed layups, easy shots," he said, perplexed. "If I had made layups we would've been down by two at half time. It makes you want to laugh. I can't remember when I played a game like this." Then, thinking about this a moment, he said, "I'm allowed one."
Malone, it turns out, is not a machine after all. Even the Mailman has times when his deliveries are marked "Return to Sender."
The remarkable thing is that despite their poor shooting, the Jazz trailed by only eight points midway through the third quarter, but Hornacek couldn't do it by himself, and the Lakers finally pulled away.
There was a telling moment in the third quarter when the Jazz had a chance for a power-play goal. Byron Scott lay on the floor injured under his own basket and his teammates stopped playing to see if he was all right. The Jazz stopped, too, but then realized that a timeout hadn't been called, inbounded the ball and raced up the court for a four-on-five break. Hornacek missed a three-point try.
This is how bad the Jazz's shooting was: Shaquille O'Neal played just 18 minutes, scored a mere 11 points and got kicked out of the game with seven minutes to go - and the Jazz lost by 20.
"The worst thing is we're going to have to sit through it again and watch it on film (Friday)," said Malone. "My day is ruined already."