Alanis Morissette was one angry broad when her third album, "Jagged Little Pill," became a national blockbuster. A bad break-up with a hockey player was the motivation behind the confrontational "Jagged Little Pill." There are not many delightful ways to have a romance with a hockey player, let alone experience a good break-up with one; hence, the album was a flurry of songs along the lines of the deeply poetic theme, "Bummer!"
While she displays emotion in her words and performances, Morissette falls into that category of artists who believe it ain't art unless it is offensive. In 1995, she waxed ACLUish when the Gram-my folks refused to allow her to sing guttersnipe words in her performance at those awards. She did anyway and boasted of being bleeped for the sake of the offensive art movement.Apparently exhausted from swearing up to eight times per song in her "Jagged Little Pill" tours, Morissette took a break for some exercise in a triathalon, a trip to India and perspective. With that perspective, she made a new album, "Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie." The album is filled with the odd Alanis enunications drawn out over four to five measures. But one song, "Thank U," about coming to terms with disappointment, is evidence of Mor-is-sette's discovery that challenges and setbacks in life are not so bad. Getting over a hockey player is hardly one of life's unbearable sorrows and Morissette remains darn funky, but she's onto something not generally acknowledged nor understood in the world d'celeb.
Throughout the choruses in "Thank U," Morissette offers gratitude: Thank you, frailty. Thank you, consequence. Thank you, disillusionment. Thankfulness is typically directed at what we have, but this formerly troubled soul found growth in the feelings and disappointments that come when the desires of our hearts and minds elude us. Just past the initial sadness, there is the grappling with pain through introspection, reflection and changed plans. Garth Brooks had the same idea: "Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers."
Increasingly there are statutory, judicial and societal shields placed between us and disappointment. A life insulated from heartache, setbacks, rigor and pain is the desired end. It's a Marxist happiness that bans sorrow, for it might produce personal gains. Comrades are equal and numb, shielded from both excellence and failure. Last week in Boston, teachers announced the abandonment of homework because the students complained it was too hard and took too much time. Education by osmosis, as opposed to practice and work, reigns in Bean Town.
But Massachusetts has more mediocrity to offer in its children's soccer leagues where no one is permitted to keep score because having one team win was too harsh a life experience. This approach is called "nonresults-oriented competition" that will give kids "more opportunity to develop all-around soccer smartness" and "enhance natural, intrinsic competition." Leave it to the home of the Kennedys to come up with psychobabble soccer. What a perfect way to train children who will not always pass tests, not always get the job they want, not always have successful romances or not always close a sale. Give them the expectation of a painless society in which no harm befalls and offer no skills for coping. If they can't deal with soccer losses, how will they handle rogue hockey player romances? Hazlitt's adage of "Prosperity is a great teacher, adversity a greater teacher" is lost on New Englanders.
As my husband and I struggle with the challenges of raising one of our children with her significant disabilities, we notice a tendency of others to issue expressions of sympathy. They fail to understand the lessons and benefits that come from an experience perceived as painful. The challenges pale when compared to the lessons of gratitude. Thank you for a child who has never once used a smart mouth with me. Thank you for a child who wears exactly what I want her to wear each day. Thank you for a child who will never have to do a science project. Thank you for a child who never gets a scuff on her shoes, let alone wears them out. Thank you for a child who never gets out of bed after you put her there. Thank you for not having to worry about her on dates.
In a world intent on achieving the painless life of ease, the simplest blessings are overlooked. This past week, Prince Charles celebrated his 50th birthday with grand parties and international attention. Donald Trump is building the highest residential tower in the world. Demi Moore gets $14 million to do a movie. But their wealth and celebrity has yet to bring them happiness. I beat royalty and millionaires on that and I am grateful.
Thank you, poverty. Thank you, simplicity. Thank you, lack of fame. Thank you, hard work. Thank you, homework. Thank you, lost games. Thank you, broken hearts. Thank you, tribulation. Thank you, patience. Thank you, experience. Sometimes what we wanted and didn't get is indeed the blessing. No pain, no gain. Thank you, Alanis.