Former Chicago Bears linebacker Mike Singletary, left by his father at age 12, has learned with time that being a dad is no easy job.

"It is extremely difficult to be a father," said Singletary, accepting a "Father of the Year" award Monday at the National Summit on Fatherhood. Singletary eventually was able to reconcile with his father and now says he wouldn't trade his dad for any other in the world."Dad was just a man, trying very hard, " said Singletary, who has seven children of his own.

Singletary joined heavyweight boxing champ Evander Holyfield, New York police officer Bruce Stayments and actor Tom Selleck as recipients of the award, honoring them for setting examples of strong fathers in a time when the role is often abandoned.

New Jersey Gov. Christine Todd Whitman described the "double jeopardy" children face when their parents separate and then their fathers make a permanent exit from their lives.

"Every family needs a full-time father regardless of whether that father lives in the home or not," Whitman said.

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Missouri Sen. John Ashcroft, author of an upcoming book "Lessons from a Father to His Son," recounted how his father knelt with him the day he was sworn in as senator. The elder Aschcroft advised his son how to act in his new office, telling him to "be humble."

"I am still struggling to learn," said the Republican senator, one of a number of political leaders showing support for the summit sponsored by The National Fatherhood Initiative.

Stayments, an award-winning police officer in Elmira, N.Y., touched the dinner crowd with the story of his decision to adopt four girls and how that later led him to set up his own "Dad School." The course brings together men from the community and those referred by the courts who have had trouble parenting to focus on their importance as fathers.

"Good fathering is contagious," Stayments said.

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