Frank Joklik's tortured logic persuades him to insult the intelligence of Utahns by telling us that a payoff in college tuition for a vote for Salt Lake is not a bribe but really only "humanitarian aid."
Poor Frank is having a hard time peddling that notion. So, I'd like to suggest another approach for Frank and the other SLOC apologists. Folks, just tell those who complain that it was simply just good old-fashioned "honest graft." And, there is precedent for taking that position.In pre-World War II days, Sen. Bilbo of Mississippi was on the Senate Armed Forces Committee. In cahoots with some of his associates, Bilbo bought a big piece of swampy land near Biloxi, Miss., for practically nothing with the idea of selling it to the military at a jacked-up price for an Army air base. Moreover, they had some other "good old boys" waiting in the wings to have Bilbo steer them a sweetheart deal to fill the swamp and make it into what is today Biloxi Air Base.
After the war, Senate investigators began looking at people who had may have illegally profited from the war effort, and the senator and Biloxi came front and center. At the conclusion of the investigation, the Senate voted not to seat Bilbo for "graft."
Bilbo saw nothing illegal about these transactions. In his words, "There's two types of 'graft,' dishonest and honest graft." In dishonest graft, he contended, everyone knows what it is and you can go to jail for it. On the other hand, he argued, "There's 'honest graft,' and while it may look immoral, indecent, scurrilous and in bad taste, you don't go to jail."
So, I suggest to Mr. Joklik and his SLOC cronies that they use the Bilbo approach and quit calling it "humanitarian aid" but say that it was just good old "honest graft." And, while it may have looked immoral, indecent and in poor taste, it was legal, and you can't send anyone to jail for it.
Howard A. Matthews
Bountiful