Monumental -- Looks like Juan Antonio Samaranch has outdone himself again. The Godfather of Graft, in Lausanne, Switzerland, last week, declared the Olympics must be saved because they're "the most important event in the world."
Shows how ignorant I am.I always thought that was the Academy Awards.
Lethal weapon -- Things got a little heated when it came down to cleaning up the Olympic mess. Korea's Un Yong Kim got so irate he assumed a tae kwon do position, threatening an IOC official.
That's not a good sign. On the one hand, you have an IOC president who thinks he's a king. On the other hand, you have a delegate who thinks he's Chuck Norris.
Head games -- The Minnesota Timberwolves magazine recently quoted forward Tom Hammonds saying he likes to "get inside the heads" of opponents. But he rates the Jazz's Karl Malone as one of the toughest guys to distract.
Still, we know what you mean, Tom.
We can't figure out what goes on inside his head, either.
Opt-out -- I guess we can forget seeing Dennis Rodman in a Jazz uniform any time soon.
In his recent NBA online chat, Jerry Sloan was asked if he would ever consider coaching the Worm. Sloan's response: "If I had the opportunity, I'd probably go back to farming permanently. That's the only answer I can give you."
We'll take that as a no.
Mistaken identity -- The NBA News recently included observations by the Warriors' Jason Caffey about his experience with the Chicago Bulls.
"What I took from it was how much work it takes to win a championship. Watching Michael, Scottie, Dennis and some of the other guys, they came in every day. They never missed a practice," said Caffey.
Excuse me, but did he say DENNIS? Never missed a PRACTICE?
Must have been a different Chicago Bulls.
Must have been a different Dennis.
Earth to Nellie -- Then there's Dallas coach Don Nelson, remarking on A.C. Green's streak of 1,000 straight games, calling it "like going to the moon and back."
Nelson said Green is "still as good as he was 10 years ago."
Sounds to me like Nellie's been spending some time on the moon himself.
Dressing down -- Reports say Utah coach Rick Majerus showed up on a recruiting visit wearing sandals, shorts and a T-shirt -- Majerus unplugged.
Maybe you could say Majerus is getting way too casual. Then again, maybe we should be grateful he finally wore something besides that sweater.
One-track minds -- Speaking of Majerus, it looks like the sweepstakes are over for another year. As usual, he's staying.
I can't say that I blame him. Where else can an obsessive guy with only one thing on his mind end up being a hero? Besides the White House, I mean.