To chefs, the most disturbing accusation to emerge from the voting morass in Florida is that of a Republican recount monitor in Broward County, who claims he saw a Democratic observer eat chads off a table. Chad, distressed cooks say, should never be eaten unaccompanied.
Hoping others will avoid this error, several chefs agreed to share favorite chad recipes, though they, like the lawyers in Florida, are divided on the proper form.
Mollie Katzen, author of the vegetarian Moosewood Cookbook, prefers Nader chad for her earth-friendly recipes. Gore chad would do in a pinch, she said, but "Bush chad would probably prefer to be hamburger filler." Bruce Cost, a partner in the Asian-themed Big Bowl restaurant chain in Chicago, was indifferent to candidate but praised the puckish snap of freshly punched chad. "Or you can take ballots with pregnant chad and punch them as you cook for extra freshness," Cost said.
For breakfast, Katzen suggested crunchy homemade "chadola," made with honey, oats, nuts and dried fruit. You could also munch this in the evenings, she added, preferably while watching indigestible punditry on television.
A light lunch? Try spicing up your salad by replacing ho-hum croutons with zesty "chadtons," said Sara Moulton, host of the Food Network's "Cooking Live" show.
For special occasions with lobbyists on expense accounts, Michel Richard, of Michel Richard Citronelle restaurant in Washington, recommends corn polenta chad, served on stone crab claw with kumquat sauce.
Rick Tramonto of TRU Restaurant in Chicago uses two pounds of chad to add heft to a lobster risotto with herbs. It'll tide you over until the election is sorted out.
Have room for dessert? Wayne Harley Brachman, executive pastry chef at Tapika, Michael Jordan's steak house and strip house in New York, uses chad liberally in his Katherine Harris Chocolate Chad Cookies. You'll need to have plenty of chad on hand, Brachman said, because the recipe calls for discarding many of them. For a lighter sweet, he suggests making your own chad using strips of candy dots. Throw out any that don't pop out cleanly.