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Let gluttons know the rules of buffet line before dinner

SHARE Let gluttons know the rules of buffet line before dinner

Dear Abby: I belong to a group that meets weekly for potluck dinners. Several guests regularly help themselves to two servings of an entree and several pieces of bread before everyone has had the opportunity to get a first serving.

Because of this, there is often no meat or bread left for those at the end of the line. Others eat quickly and get back in line for second and third helpings before some have had their first!

This can only be described as gluttony, and it has upset members of our group. Should we appoint a leader and announce the buffet-line rules before the dinner begins, or should we speak to the offenders individually?—Offended in Texas

Dear Offended: I think an etiquette lesson is in order. Don't single out the culprits; it would only embarrass them. Make a general announcement of the rules before dinner. Alternatively, designate members to "serve" sensible portions. That should put a stop to the pigging out.

Dear Abby: I have been divorced for three years. My ex-husband and I remain on good terms. Our 13-year-old son lives with me.

I was wondering, Abby, if it is appropriate to display a wedding picture of my ex and me in the living room.—Janice in Massachusetts

Dear Janice: If looking at the wedding picture gives you and your son pleasure and brings back memories of the "good times," there's certainly no harm in displaying it. However, if and when you begin a serious relationship, I'd recommend putting it away — or giving it to your son for his room.

My instincts tell me you still have romantic feelings for your ex. If he feels the same way, get joint professional counseling and see what develops. It is not unheard of for people to remarry.

Dear Abby: When a spouse dies, I know that many people continue to wear their wedding rings. However, after a divorce, how soon must you remove them?—Eve in Alabama

Dear Eve: Tradition and the rules of etiquette dictate that when a woman is no longer married, she removes her wedding band. The rings can be disposed of in any way she sees fit. (Some women have them made into earrings!) However, I find it curious that anyone would persist in wearing a reminder of a painful experience on her ring finger, left hand — which would discourage attention from someone who might be suitable.


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