PHILADELPHIA — Still mopping up from the 150,000-balloon Republican National Convention . . .
. . . and I'm not alone. Approximately 400 people the Philadelphia police call "out-of-town professional protesters" are still sitting in the Philadelphia jail.
No $5 jaywalking tickets for them, which is what protesters got last month in Washington, D.C.
Many of whom showed up in Philadelphia expecting a similar deal.
But as Rocky would say, "nuttin' doin'."
Now they're here until they come up with $50,000 bail money or they write "Yo Adrian" 100,000 times on the chalkboard, whichever comes first.
If you're keeping score, that's 400 fewer "out-of-town professional protesters" for the Democratic National Convention coming right up in Los Angeles.
So Philadelphia remains the city of brotherly love.
The most lingering impression from the convention is the determined glint in George W. Bush's eye.
Clearly, here is a man determined to make amends, to avenge defeat, to restore honor after that devastating event that so embarrassed the family name in the early 1990s . . .
. . . when he traded Sammy Sosa to the Cubs.
Sure, he didn't know who Sammy Sosa was back then when Bush was a part-owner of the Texas Rangers. None of us knew who Sammy Sosa was back then.
Still, can a man be president who traded away Sammy Sosa? For Harold Baines?
What if Bush becomes president and one day trades the Virgin Islands for Iceland?
And there's always the fear, not exactly unfounded, that a Texan in the White House would go ahead and sell Alaska to the Russians or the Canadians for the sole purpose that Texas might resume its rightful position as biggest state in the Union.
Lyndon Johnson never did it, but Lyndon Johnson was a Democrat.
Still, you've got to like Bush's chances.
I'm predicting he'll win Utah hands down.
This, despite the fact Utah's Republicans at the Philadelphia convention felt they were treated like they were a young Sammy Sosa.
There was considerable complaining by delegates from the state with the current largest Bush percentage getting relegated to a hotel way across the river in New Jersey and getting convention floor seats on the far right that were worse than anybody's except New Hampshire's.
The New Hampshire that voted for John McCain.
No one could seem to sort out exactly why Utah — a state that relegated Bill Clinton to third place in the 1992 election behind George Bush's father and Ross Perot — would rate such marginal accommodations.
One theory that seemed to make sense is that Republicans don't have to worry about carrying Utah.
Anyway, all was well that ended well, and with Bush's post-convention burst in the ratings, no one was arguing that the week didn't end well.
Everybody headed back to Utah with souvenirs. Some bigger than others. John Price, the wealthy Utahn who heads up Bush's Utah campaign, bought a fiberglass statue of an elephant named "Phil" that stood in front of the Four Seasons Hotel all week wearing a shirt, slippers, nightcap and robe — all in red, white and blue.
According to the Philadelphia Inquirer, the price Price paid, including shipping by flatbed truck, was $5,000.
Exactly where Price plans to put Phil, he hasn't said. But it will surely be a place of honor for the GOP mascot that did something no Utah 2000 delegate could manage: It spent the week at a Philadelphia hotel.
Lee Benson's column runs Sunday, Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Please send e-mail to benson@desnews.com and faxes to 801-237-2527.