We were eating breakfast when my father got the news that his youngest brother had disappeared in a lake outside Soda Springs, Idaho.
When he shared the horrible news, I had a bite of toast in my mouth. I could scarcely swallow it because a lump in my throat was in the way.
It was the cruelest of fates. This particular uncle's wife had died of leukemia a couple of years earlier. I couldn't get my mind off the idea that my cousins had been orphaned.
Until they found my uncle's body, I refused to believe that he was gone. I knew him as a rough-tough hard rock miner. I entertained any number of scenarios: that he had swum to the lake shore and lost his way in the woods or that he had struck his head and couldn't remember who he was (a story line I had likely lifted from a soap opera).
Several days later, my uncle's body was recovered and returned to New Mexico for burial. It wasn't the outcome for which I had hoped, but it gave the family some closure.
It's what I wish for the family of 19-month-old Acacia Patience Bishop, who is presumed drowned in the Snake River in Idaho Falls after she was allegedly abducted Sunday from Salt Lake County by her grandmother, Kelley Jean Lodmell. Lodmell faces charges of kidnapping and murder by aggravated battery and/or kidnapping in Idaho state court.
The circumstances of my uncle's disappearance were nothing like those of Acacia's. He died on a boating excursion. The only parallel I can draw is the horror of waiting and the devastation when the answer comes.
My parents shielded my brothers and me from the worst of it. My heart ached for my cousins who had been effectively orphaned. Wasn't it enough that they had lost their mother? I grieved for my father, whom I had never seen so heartbroken.
It all seemed so unfair to me then. To be quite honest, it still does. Many years later, I've come to understand that life is not neat and tidy. Loose ends and injustice are a part of living.
Acacia's family's trials are far worse. The loss of any beloved family member is its own tragedy. For the child to have been kidnapped and allegedly drowned at the hands of her own grandmother only compounds the heartbreak.
You're supposed to be able to turn to your mother when your world is turned on its end. Instead, Kelley Jean Lodmell is behind bars, accused of killing her own daughter's child.
Beyond the agonizing wait to find her daughter, Casey Lodmell has a mentally ill mother whose issues have been trotted out for all to see after Acacia's kidnapping.
Acacia's family has vowed to stay in Idaho until their little one is returned to them. Hopefully their wait will be over soon so they can take their daughter home and begin the process of healing. My sense is it will be a long journey for all of them.
I know it was for my dad's family, but my cousins have gone on to have their own families, and by all accounts they are wonderful parents and spouses. The last time I talked to my cousin Pam, she joked that she spent so much time at her children's elementary school that they would someday name the gymnasium after her.
The point is, with time and distance, they got on with the business of living and loving. Really, that's all we can do when life throws us those "cosmic curveballs."
Marjorie Cortez is a Deseret News editorial writer. E-mail her at marjorie@desnews.com.