NEW YORK — He'd make the model neighbor, the ideal best friend, the perfect date for your teenage daughter.
He possesses, according to those who know him best, a great personality and a strong will. A native New Yorker, he's easy-going, good-looking and hard-working.
Sure, he's only 3 years old. But on Saturday, Funny Cide — a longshot gelding turned Secretariat-in-waiting over the last month — could emerge as the first Triple Crown winner in 25 years by winning the Belmont Stakes.
Since capturing the Kentucky Derby as a 12-1 shot on May 3, Funny Cide has evolved into a horse both popular and populist, a blue-collar hero with bridle and bit.
"He's the underdog, the people's choice," said Bill Nader, senior vice president of the New York Racing Association. "What's great is this horse snuck up on people. It's the way he won."
And it's the way he acts, both on and off the track. Around the barns at his Belmont home, Funny Cide is frequently discussed in anthropomorphic terms.
"He's got a nice personality," said trainer Barclay Tagg, standing outside Barn No. 6 after Funny Cide completed a recent training run. "He's a bit of a ham."
In fact, Funny Cide appears more comfortable with the media than his trainer. The horse preens for photographers and camera crews, bobbing his head confidently — a chestnut Sylvester Stallone working the red carpet on Oscar night.
"The attention is unnatural for us," said co-trainer Robin Smullen, who also doubles as the horse's practice rider. "But Funny Cide loves it."
Yet the horse still possesses the common touch. Heading to the track for a morning workout, Funny Cide will stop to cop a peppermint candy from a Belmont security guard.
Jockey Jose Santos said Funny Cide was, as befitting a New Yorker, growing stronger in the spotlight.
"You can see the horse getting taller, getting wider, getting wiser," a confident Santos said. "He's very happy now. He can't be better."
Not really true; Funny Cide would definitely improve with a victory in the third leg of the Triple Crown, making him the first horse to capture the title since Affirmed in 1978.
It would also make him the first-ever New York-bred Triple Crown winner, and the first-ever gelding to win the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness and the Belmont.
Even a loss would likely do little damage to his rosy reputation. "He's a nice horse," said Tagg. "Easy to train."
But what about that name?
In the past, a horse's monicker seemed to trumpet its greatness: Sir Barton in 1919, the first Triple Crown winner. Gallant Fox in 1930, Citation in 1948, Secretariat in 1973.
"Noble, regal names," said comedian Joe Piscopo.
Funny Cide? It's the Moon Unit Zappa of horse names.
"It sounds like he should run wearing funny glasses and a fake nose," Piscopo said. "Maybe the jockey could warm up the crowd before the race: 'Where ya from? Hey, nice tie.' "
As in Zappa's case, blame the parents. His mother was Belle's Good Cide, and his father Distorted Humor. Funny Cide was a misguided homage to both.
While the horse runs the track like Carl Lewis, he can resemble octogenarian Abe Vigoda in the barn.
For treatment of a breathing problem, Funny Cide was fitted with a transpirator — a device that fits over his face like an oxygen mask, pumping steam into the horse to clean out his throat.
His stable's silks are gray with maroon trim — the colors of Sackets Harbor High School, where six of Funny Cide's owners graduated. In a world dominated by Kentucky blue bloods and Saudi sheiks, they bought Funny Cide for the bargain price of $75,000 in November 2001.
And as a gelding . . . well, let's cut to the chase. Winning the Triple Crown would be a diamond in his crown, but it won't restore the family jewels.
For all his human tendencies, Tagg hopes his horse possesses one important equine attribute when he hits the starting gate June 7.
"He's faster, I hope," Tagg deadpanned. "That's a good thing to be in a race."