We all have many things to be thankful for this holiday season. Every day is a reason to celebrate. Yet we wake up and put on our perfectionism, along with our martyred attitudes, and proceed to make everyone's life miserable. I think that it is time that we counted our blessings and put that chip that is on our shoulder in the fireplace for kindling.
Why do we make ourselves feel bad over the most inconsequential events? I have always said, "What doesn't matter; just doesn't matter." But we continue to make mountains out of molehills; all because that perfectionist monster will not allow us to rest. That monster turns a simple act of folding towels into a fight to the death over which way is the best way. Has your husband ever folded the towels for you and you pitched one of your fits over how to do it the right way or shall I say, how your mother folded towels?
When Robert and I got married, he asked me if I was going to refold the towels after he had helped fold them. I explained that any help was greatly appreciated and why would I want to do double work? This had happened to him in the past, and he just wanted to make sure that I was not going to scold him for folding them wrong.
When we put on a thankful heart we can find joy in everything around us. There are moments during a crisis where we cannot find anything to be thankful for, but if you will look hard there is always something to celebrate. Every bad event in my life has ended up being something that I could look back on and be thankful for. I would not change a single moment, because those times have ended up making me who I am today.
One of my mentors, Rita Davenport, taught me that if money will fix it; it is not a problem. I have quoted her many times, and this is so hard for people to understand. I want you to think about the things that money cannot fix. No amount of money is going to bring a loved one back to life. In this context those bills we have seem trivial. It is up to us to realize our blessings and figure out ways to use our resources more wisely.
Problems come in all shapes and sizes. Rita gave an example in her motivational tape series, "It's Time for You."
If we all wrote down our biggest problem and put it in a hat, and then drew a new problem out of the hat, we would all be searching really hard for our own problem. So you see, our problems are our problems. They are not the end of the world, and if money is the problem, it is not really a problem.
Finding ways to be thankful takes practice. If you do not have an instinctual heart of gratitude, then it is time for you to fake it until you make it. I learned this from another mentor, Sarah Ban Branach, in her book "Simple Abundance." Each day write down five things that you are thankful for. This will help you to think about the blessings you have in your daily activity.
Let's celebrate each day with a thankful heart and enjoy the process. Thanksgiving Day doesn't have to come once a year! Adding gratitude to your daily routine will illuminate your shining sink with a different light!
Marla Cilley, a k a FlyLady, is the author of Sink Reflections (Bantam Books Trade Paperback). For more help, please go to her Web site: www.FlyLady.net. © 2005