Actual news as reported in the Deseret News during September 1905 —
"The Great Salt Lake continues to shrink and the local weather office expects this to continue for at least two weeks longer before the lake's level becomes stationary."
"Sixty days in the county jail is the sentence imposed upon Gus Roseander by Justice of the Peace Bishop on Saturday for disturbing the peace. Roseander went to this home just south of the city on Friday night and attempted to break up all of the furniture in the house."
"W.W. Calder is home from a three week study of the face of nature in the mountains in back of Farmington. Calder displays three scratches on his left arm which he says were given by a female grizzly bear as he was attempting to make off with her cubs. But Mr. Calder's jealous neighbors argue that it is nothing more than a vaccination mark."
"Local liverymen say that the tourist traffic has been so heavy this summer that the multiplication of the automobile has apparently had no effect on the livery business."
"The departure of Utah men for eastern colleges is beginning in earnest. Lloyd W. Brooke, Royal Martineau and Frank Miller, the first two graduates of the high school class of 1905 and the last from the Collegiate Institute, leave tonight to enter Harvard."
"The Lehi correspondent of the 'News' reports that Utah Lake is lower than it has ever been in the history of the state.
"Jealous Italian shoots another. Frank Mazzer fires bullet into Joseph Vatrella over alleged love affair. He then makes his escape. Latter's wife said wounded man assaulted her, hence the deadly assault."
"Little boy drowns. Everett Cudick falls in ditch in West Jordan."
"Over 400 high school students reported at the West Side High School for registration and classification."
"F.J. Senior claims 600 acres in City Creek Canyon and proposes to build a hotel and summer cottages up there."
"At 3 o'clock yesterday afternoon superintendent of waterworks Hines turned water from City Creek into the pipes at the city and county building, and hereafter City Creek water will be used in the building instead of Parley's creek water."
"John H. Niller, an old resident of the city and now visiting his former home in England, has just been married to one of the playmates of his youth, to the great surprise of his friends and relatives in Salt Lake."
"The large shade trees which made the front of the old St. James Hotel so attractive on a warm day, have been cut down by the management of the Lyric Theater, which has taken the place of the old hostelry."
"A farewell will be given next Monday night in the 18th Ward meetinghouse to Elder Harry Shepherd, who is about to leave on a mission to Germany. A fine program has been prepared for the occasion."