"MISSION: INCREDIBLES," Desert Star Cabaret, Murray, through Nov. 11 (266-2600 or www.desertstar.biz). Running time: two hours (two intermissions).

MURRAY — "Mission Impossible" meets the Daily Planet. Or, in this case, the Deseret Tribune, a Salt Lake City newsroom where not just one but all four reporters are superheroes.

Co-written by Desert Star box-office manager Laura Lewis and two of her sisters, Amy and Anna, "Mission: Incredibles" takes a mix of superheroes and superspies in a parody of a Hollywood star with a super ego — Tom Cruise.

The newsroom — which is decidedly more Salt Lake Tribune than Deseret Morning News, since the agitated editor has a big cigar — has two stars, John and Marsha, the Utah version of Clark Kent and Lois Lane. Neither realizes that the other is a superhero on the side.

John, played by Ed Farnsworth, is Cricket Man, who obtained his insect-like powers after being bitten by a cricket in Tooele. His No. 1 nemesis is, of course, the Seagull (Ben Millet, who also plays the editor and several other roles). And Marsha (Bonnie Wilson Whitlock) is Moody Blues, who can channel and transfer other people's deepest feelings.

John's sidekick is William Sonoma (Justin Berry), whose assortment of kitchen gadgets are lethal weapons (his cape is a red-and-white checked tablecloth). And assisting Moody Blues is Sissy Spastic (Ashley Kathryn Mayfield), a somewhat loopy psychic.

The action shifts into high gear when their editor, who thinks education stories are boring, learns that Tom Cruise (Dan Larrinaga) is in town. Sissy thinks he's the celebrity who promotes proctology, but it's quickly explained that he's into Scientology.

What Cruise is really doing in Salt Lake City is trying to find the secret recipe for a butter-flavored love potion that he intends to spray on popcorn to make audiences worldwide love him, after which he will star in remakes of everything from "Citizen Kane" to "Gone With the Wind." ("Take that, Paramount," he yells.)

The superhero quartet gets its "mission" marching orders from Gen. Authority (Liz Christensen), head of a top secret government spy agency. Tom Cruise has to depend on his valet, Skippy (Scott Holman), for help.

There are plenty of sight gags and hilarious lyrics en route to the inevitable conclusion. When Cricket Man and Moody Blues are scaling the exterior wall of a skyscraper, Superman zooms by ("Oh, he's such a show-off," they agree). And one of Cricket Man's missions is to "Bozeman, Mont., Spanish-speaking."

The post-show olios have a back-to-school theme. (Do you know why history repeats itself? Because you didn't pay attention the first time.)


E-mail: ivan@desnews.com