The other night I was at a friend's sleepover, and she brought out some weed and talked about sneaking alcohol and getting drunk. I've always been against it, and I told her that if she did it, I would call my mom and leave. She said she wouldn't, but later on she got high anyway. I didn't want to call my mom that late, so I just stayed. Now everyone at the party makes fun of me for being a "good girl." Did I do the right thing? —Name withheld, Franklin, Pa.

You went with your gut feeling, and that's always a good choice. Obviously you're smart enough to know the dangers of drugs and alcohol, so you did the right thing by not participating. People who do participate often try to get others to join them so that their decision seems more OK. When you said no, it made the girls who said yes feel threatened, so they retaliated by making fun of you.

Nice job standing your ground — it couldn't have been easy. Since you're not happy with the outcome, though, you could do one of a few things. If you're ever in that situation again, simply say no thanks without bringing parents into it, unless you think someone is in immediate danger (like they're about to get behind the wheel after drinking or getting high).

On the other hand, if you're super-uncomfortable even being around alcohol and drugs — which is understandable — go ahead and call your mom no matter what the hour. She won't mind waking up in the middle of the night to come get you if it means you'll be away from the illegal substances. That said, if your friends continue to use and/or to make fun of you for not joining in, it's probably time to try finding a few new people to hang out with. You deserve friends who have the same values as you.


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