WEDNESDAY, AUG. 22 — Hungry, thirsty, physically exhausted but filled spiritually, my family and I emerged from the Wilkinson Center Tuesday evening hours after the sun had set. On the morrow, BYU Campus Education Week would continue.
As we walked to the car, our thoughts were of rest. We could hardly wait to surrender our eyelids and cross into the land of sleep and dreams, a magical place free of collegiate rivalries and . . .
Where's Grandpa?
We took a quick roll call. Mom? Here. Grandma? Here. Me? Present. Grandpa? Missing in action. I hear there's cougars in Provo. Maybe the cougars got him.
The locals watching us with apparent amusement, we huddled over a campus map to discuss strategic operations. Our intelligence of the immediate region was scarce, but our morale was high, and after hard-nosed negotiations among those in our company, our mission was finalized. We would execute at approximately 21:30 hours.
But then new intel came in: Doesn't Grandpa have a cell phone?
"Hello? Grandpa, this is Michael. We're coming for evac. Do you copy? Over."
His voice was silent for a moment. "I copy."
Thank heavens.
"Hang tight, Grandpa. Just hang tight. What is your current position?"
"I think I'm on East Campus Road. Northwest corner."
What road? What campus? Confound it! The man must be in shock. For all we knew, he could be in downtown Orem by now.
I passed our mobile communication to Grandma. A natural wind-talker, she has more experience with code-red situations.
"David," she said with all the sternness of a military officer or a seasoned Relief Society instructor, "what buildings can you see?"
"Buildings? Oh, I'm right in front of the Wilkinson Student Center."
Sighing in relief, we returned to Wilkinson to retrieve our downed man. Then, as we headed again for the car, each of us struggled to withhold our suspicious glances. Grandpa has a traitorous sense of direction and a wicked sense of humor, and I suppose that until I'm "honorably discharged" from mortality, I will never know which of his senses was in command that night.
Our mission completed, my family unit, too fatigued to ask many questions, finally retired to our hotel and surrendered.
(Michael Madson is a returned missionary from the China Hong Kong Mission. He is currently a freelance writer and a student of English and French at Weber State University. His epic fantasy novel, "Lady in White," will be released in October by Mother's House Publishing.)