Sometimes, even I still get surprised.

After spending over five years reporting on Utah County high school sports (mostly girls, but some boys events), I've run into several different types of people attending a nice cross section of sporting events. And it's so much fun to watch the wide variety of reactions different stimuli provide.

Most are entertaining in at least some small way, but others can anger or even sadden the most hardened of fans. Sometimes I find myself as intrigued by the fans as I am by the event itself.

It's helpful to watch girls sports because generally the smaller number of fans in attendance means you can hear much of what they have to say as opposed to a boys event where there are so many fans that they all kind of drown each other out.

And what I've decided in my years of fan observation is that there are basically four main generalities of fans out there:

1. Provide positive energy.

2. Neutral.

3. Mildly annoying.

4. Why do we have to put up with these people?

In each generality, there are subgroups into which most fans can be placed.

While it's true most cannot be pigeonholed into merely one of these categories, and most actually exhibit signs of several throughout a game, this provides an interesting look at girls fans and their behavior in general. And most of those who have spent much time at girls events will be able to pick out a few fans in each category, especially if they're into crowd watching or listening.

Positives

The first five subgroups belong to the positive family, and they tend to make me laugh or at least smile several times in every game for one reason or another.

ENERGIZER BUNNIES These little batteries just keep going and going and going. They zip into games long before the start and have a supreme knack for motivating a large portion of the crowd.

They are typically students and appear in small numbers, cheering loudly and positively for their team. These rare animals come to every game, and not every school can lay claim to one, but all schools do want one and search their halls every year with high hopes. When found, they're latched onto like the nearly extinct species they are.

REAL STUDENTS OF THE GAME You might not get much in the way of cheering from these sharp minds, but if you sit next to one you'll gain plenty in the way of insight. They typically maintain a quiet and philosophical approach to the game, even if their own daughter is on the court.

They're hard to spot other than the serious concentrated expressions on their faces, and they don't have much to say, unless you ask. But if you get them out of their shells, you can learn plenty about game plans, tendencies, strategies, talent levels and how they can be attacked, defended or improved.

As you might expect, many turn out to be coaches and scouts, but some are just true students of the game they love.

CHEERLEADERS OK, they're not teenage girls in short skirts jumping up and down. These are the people in the crowd who are always excited, always happy and always positive. They cheer for every play.

Though they might be louder for their own team, they give the opponents plenty of love, too. They clap and scream for great plays and give encouragement after rough-edged efforts.

These people are ego-boosters. There are usually a few planted here and there at an event, but sometimes they're drowned out by those with a less-positive approach.

HONEY, I'M AT THE GAME Many of these supportive parents and friends have never seen a ball before and don't know tennis from football, but they come to every game dutifully and watch every move their daughter makes, even if it's just shuffling her weight on the bench.

They pay careful attention to those around them and cheer when the cues are given.

This group can be highly offended by some others but would never say a word as they don't feel capable of even pretending to understand what's going on.

FAN WARS These happen when one fan yells about a specific play or call, and the opposite fans react. They begin innocently enough but wind up with shouts reverberating back and forth. Most of the time they're good-natured and add to the excitement of the game.

Neutrals

Neutral fans can be just as entertaining from a crowd-watching standpoint as positive fans, but they do little in the way of providing fan support for the teams involved.

SOCIALITES They come in all shapes and sizes. Moms, dads, grandparents, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, friends and just students looking for acceptance.

Generally these people know very little about the sport and pay very little attention to the game at all except to cheer for their girl when they happen to notice her.

Mostly they show up to be seen or prove they're giving support. You can spot them easily by glancing around and searching out those paying plenty of attention to the person next to them and little to none on the game itself.

TEXT ME, PLEASE These little birdies are showing up in larger numbers every year, and the age range is expanding rapidly. Years ago they were mostly teens, but now business people and moms are joining in the fun.

You can spot them by their cell phones. They RARELY put them down and are generally punching some inane language into them such as: "R U Cmng?" "We R up 10 at half" or "Want 2 go 2 mvie 2nite aftr gm?"

The texts range from intense game information to chatter about the opposite sex or to them to business transactions. But the little technos can rarely spare a hand for clapping.

IS THE GAME OVER YET? You know what these "fans" are thinking or maybe even saying: "My parents dragged me here, but all I want to do is be anywhere else. Why do I have to watch everything my sister does? She doesn't come to all of my stuff."

This also applies to anyone of any age or relationship to those involved who has absolutely zero interest in sports of any kind. They are easily picked out with their dazed and bored expressions and twiddling thumbs. Many may also be doing homework or catching up on their reading.

Mildly annoying

While I generally find myself mildly amused by the "mildly annoying" fans, they don't have the same effect on everyone at the game and can really cause some difficult feelings in the crowd or with the people involved in the game itself.

CAN'T SIT DOWN Rare at girls games but does happen in small portions, especially at certain gyms. These students arrive in large packs, move together, shout loudly, though only occasionally about the game itself, and never allow their behinds to touch their chairs unless absolutely nothing is going on.

While energizing to the teams, this phenomena can be difficult on elderly people or those with difficulties standing. Some are courteous enough to either move or warn the people around them, but others lack that form of common decency.

MY DAUGHTER, MY GLORY They walk into the gym loudly though sometimes surreptitiously, announcing their daughter's jersey number ... and that she is the star of the team or would be, if the coach would simply play her right.

They tell you all about their own thwarted dreams but that she's much more athletic anyway and could easily be better than Michael Jordan, Logan Tom, Jenny Finch or Tiger Woods (depending on the sport) if only she had the right work ethic and the right coaching.

They point out her contribution on every play, no matter what it was and are bitterly disappointed if she has a rough game. The other girls on her team rarely live up to her potential, and the coaches rarely play her correctly. Referees never give her a fair shake, and she hardly ever puts in the effort she should after the money they've spent to get her there.

PHIL JACKSON IN STREET CLOTHES Though they don't always stand and run up and down the sidelines with the play, many have been seen doing so on occasion. These are the people in the stands who know infinitely more than the coach on the bench and feel every girl on the team requires the benefit of this knowledge at all times.

These are the people, most often parents, who keep up a loud running game-long commentary, constantly giving advice and telling the girls exactly what they should be doing and what they're doing wrong.

"Move your feet." "Go left." "Stay with her." "Drive." "Hit it down the line." "Pitch her outside." And about 10,000 other pieces of advice screamed at nearly every possession.

But it doesn't stop at the play. "Put her in." "Why are you playing that defense?" Why's she in the game?" The coaches hear it. too.

'STRIPES' IN THE STANDS "Everything you call is wrong." "I could call this game better with my eyes closed." "How could you miss that call?" Whether it's a line or net call in volleyball, a foul call or traveling in basketball, or a strike/ball or out call in softball, the referees on the field are never as good as the ones in the stands.

"Call it both ways," is my personal favorite, especially if your team is either up by 20 points or the other team has twice as many fouls against them. But at least those on the field of play can generally get a chuckle out of the knucklehead comments.

The rest

Now, seriously, about this next group why does anyone have to put up with these people?

INCITE ME A RIOT These fans believe they're cheering their team to victory, or at least I hope they do, but every word escaping their lips is either rude, disgusting, obscene or generally hateful. Most are high school students who cheer loudly and are warned time and again for their behavior, and thankfully some have been kicked out altogether.

In my opinion, more should be. Some negativity is acceptable and even expected, but it crosses the line when it goes from laughing about a missed free throw or a clumsy turnover to a personal attack.

And these fans are the emperors of personal attacks, calling girls on the other team fat, ugly, dumb, idiots and many worse comments inappropriate for print.

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Though horrible it's to be expected from clueless kids, but it really shouldn't be tolerated when coming from the mouths of so-called adults.

SKEWER 'BLUE' ON A PITCHFORK These lovelies begin yelling epithets at the officials before they even think of making their first call. Though "blind" and "biased" and "Did you come from (fill in the blank)" are the norm, these people get rough. They go to the same extremes as the rioters but level all of their distaste at the men in stripes all game long.

Thank heaven most of the fans at the game stick to the first three categories throughout, and its rare to find someone in the last two, but it's sickening that they exist at all, especially at high school games where all these kids are doing is trying to work hard and have fun being part of a team.


E-mail: jolsen@desnews.com

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