SALT LAKE CITY — And with the 14th pick in the 2013 NBA Draft, the Utah Jazz select …
With so many variables, your guess is probably as good as the prognostications made by members of the NBA writing community who get paid to postulate about things like this.
And if your guess is the same as theirs, NBA Commissioner David Stern — in his final draft, by the way — will finish that sentence by pronouncing a German name.
Pronounced, well, ask a returned LDS missionary in your neighborhood.
We'll have to wait until Thursday night to find out who's right — if anybody — but the majority of mock drafters believe the lanky and athletic 19-year-old point guard will call Utah "home, sweet home."
Or — pardon the accent — "Trautes Heim, Glück allein!"
Of the well-known publications and websites to put out mock drafts — emphasis on the mock part — the majority of writers are singing the same German tune. NBA.com, Sports Illustrated, Sheridan Hoops, Hoopsworld.com (times four writers) and SBNation.com all have Schroeder typed in as the Jazz's first first-round pick.
"Schroeder is the explosive playmaker the Jazz have been lacking since Deron Williams left," Sheridan Hoops' Joe Kotoch wrote.
"Rumors around the league persist that Schroeder has an early first-round promise," SI.com's Chris Mannix added, "and the Jazz make as much sense as any."
ESPN.com basketball wiz Chad Ford also has Schroeder heading to Utah, but with the Jazz's No. 21 selection. A couple of other mocks see that scenario playing out as well.
Sorry, Dirk Nowitzki.
Ford wrote that from what he can gather, Utah "isn't in love with any of the point guards who would be left on the board" by the time the final lottery pick comes around at No. 14.
That's why he has the Jazz nabbing 7-footer Lucas Nogueira with their lottery selection.
"The Jazz have been high on Nogueira for a while," Ford wrote, "but his performance at the Eurocamp might have sealed the deal for this lithe, long, athletic shot-blocker."
But these mock drafts are all over the board this year.
And, it turns out, Schroeder isn't the only popular pick for Utah.
CBSSports.com's writers, Yahoo.com, Rotoworld.com, TheHoopsReport.com and BleacherReport.com think Miami point guard Shane Larkin will take his talents from South Beach to Salt Lake City. Perhaps his father, Hall of Fame shortstop Barry Larkin, can get a part-time gig with the Bees if that happens.
"There's no reason Larkin can't become the floor leader, long-term solution the Jazz need at that position," CBSSports.com NBA writer Matt Moore wrote.
USA Today has the Jazz picking point guard C.J. McCollum — from Lehigh, not Nephigh — in their late lottery spot.
The Sporting News sees Syracuse point guard Michael Carter-Williams landing in Utah, even calling it a "dream scenario" for the Jazz.
NBADraft.net and NBADraftInsider.com like UCLA small forward Shabazz Muhammad's chances of ending up in Utah, and presumably not just because his first name seems like a match-made-in-heaven for the Jazz.
InsideHoops.com is calling for another Gonzaga player to suit up in a Utah uniform — center Kelly Olynyk, not one of the Stocktons.
DraftExpress.com has Duke big Mason Plumlee going to Jazzland with the 14th pick. (Insert Carlos Boozer joke here.)
Fansided.com guesses that Pittsburgh center Steven Adams, whose Panthers lost at ESA in the NCAAs in March, will join Derrick Favors and Enes Kanter in Utah's front court.
Which brings the running total to nine players the Jazz are going to get with merely one lottery pick. (Hmm. Maybe Utah should try missing out on the playoffs more often.)
Olynyk, Adams, Nogueira, Kansas center Jeff Withey, Providence shooting guard Ricky Ledo, Senegal center Gorgui Dieng, French big man Rudy Gobert, North Texas power forward Tony Mitchell, North Carolina small forward Reggie Bullock, D-League shooting guard Glen Rice Jr. and San Diego State shooting guard Jamaal Franklin are among the names in the mock talk for the Jazz's second first-round pick at No. 21.
Oh, and the guys who dared throw some pasta against the wall by making second-round guesses ought to receive a bonus if the names they put out for Utah's selection at No. 46 happen to stick.
Those random names include Duke power forward Ryan Kelly (NBADraft.net), Lietuvos Rytas guard Nemanja Nedovic (DraftExpress.com), Memphis small forward Adonis Thomas (Moore, CBSSports.com) and Spanish shooting guard Alex Abrines (CBSSports.com's Gary Parrish).
"Abrines," Parrish wrote, "is a quick wing with good shooting range."
Remind reporters to ask Schroeder how to say that in German when he shows up for his first Utah press conference as a Jazz player.