Sept. 28 is, by tradition, the birthdate of China's greatest philosopher and foremost teacher: Confucius (kun-FYOO-shus). He was born to the K'ung family in 551 B.C., and the name by which he is known today is really a Latinized form of K'ung Fu-tzu, which means "K'ung the Grand Master."
I suppose that most people associate Confucius with the short, succinct observations and general truths that seem to have been designed to fit inside a fortune cookie. And, although Confucius' philosophy and teachings are elaborate and detailed, these pithy proverbs or adages or aphorisms do, indeed, reveal the virtues embodied in his beliefs and the wisdom in his teachings."Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without." This observation from Confucius has, of course, nothing to do with diamonds or pebbles. But can your children see that its wisdom lies in what it has to say about human beings and human aspirations?
The problem of getting children to see how one idea or object can stand for or represent another in a proverb (as the diamond in Confucius' adage can represent a person who strives for excellence or perfection) is just one of the problems we face in helping children to understand and profit from commonly known "wise sayings."
Another problem, one we all-too-frequently overlook, is that a lot of children have simply never heard many of the sayings that we use and hear and consider part of our common culture. These children may hear the phrase "a new broom sweeps clean" used in a political debate and not understand whether it is being said in support of the incumbent or the challenger. What would they make of adages like "The early bird catches the worm"; "One swallow does not a summer make"; or "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink"? Nothing, probably, and that's a shame because proverbs like these ARE, in fact, part of our cultural heritage, and they DO, in fact, provide us with some poetic generalization about human experience, which can help children better understand the world they live in.
Parents need to explain both the literal and the metaphorical meaning of common adages for their children, and then have those children imagine other situations to which each saying can properly apply. For example, worms do come up to the surface in the cool damp morning, but not in the heat of the day. An "early bird" benefits from this knowledge, and so do many job seekers and ticket buyers who heed this advice.
One of my favorite ways to acquaint children with commonly used "wise sayings" (and to show them that they cannot live by proverbs alone), is to collect pairs of proverbs that contradict each other. I might advise, for example, that you "Look before you leap," but you could reply "He who hesitates is lost." "Nothing ventured, nothing gained," but "It's better to be safe than sorry." "Don't look a gift horse in the mouth," but "Beware of Greeks bearing gifts." "Above all, to thine own self be true," but "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." "Actions speak louder than words," but "The pen is mightier than the sword." "Silence is golden," but "The squeaky wheel gets the grease."
Want some more? Check your library for "An Almanac of Words At Play," by Willard Espy, and "The Hodgepodge Book," by Duncan Emrich. - William F. Russell's books for parents and children include "Classics to Read Aloud to Your Children" and "Classic Myths to Read Aloud." Send your questions and comments to him at Family Learning, 2400 E. Main St., Suite 266, St. Charles, IL 60174-2414.