Dear Abby: As a female barber, I've often heard complaints such as the one "Mad in Biloxi, Miss." wrote to you about: barbers who turn their chairs away from the mirror during the haircut, so the customer can't see what the barber is doing until the haircut is finished.
I do not agree with that practice at all. I work in a little town in Oregon, and I have always maintained that a really good haircut must be a collaboration between the barber and the customer. Any input from the customer during the procedure is greatly ap-pre-ciated.When I get a customer in my chair, the first thing I do is turn the chair around so the customer is facing the mirror. (I also use a side-view mirror to help get the sides even.)
I work using the mirrors for guidance so the customer can watch what I'm doing and comment if he (or she) has anything to say.
I try to please the customer. I may not get it right the first time, but I always encourage the customer to be honest with me, and I am grateful for a second chance. By approaching my job as a col-lab-orative effort, it increases the chances for success.
"Mad in Biloxi's" barber must have come from the old school of barbering. They have a saying, "The only difference between a good haircut and a bad one is two weeks."
- Susan Ledwidge,
Wilsonville, Ore. Dear Susan: Terrific! If our governor (Pete Wilson) ever needs a haircut when he's in Oregon, I'll recommend you.
Dear Abby: This is for the woman who said she'd rather die than have a mastectomy. She is so wrong, but who am I to argue with a woman who wants to die?
There are greater tragedies in life than having a breast removed. I know from experience. Losing a breast did not make me a lesser woman. I wear a prosthesis. I also wear a wig and glasses, and if I live long enough to need a hearing aid, I'll get one. And gladly!
Since my mastectomy, I've seen my children graduate from college, I became a grandmother again, and I've done a lot of things that one puts off until "tomorrow." None of my friends has deserted me, my kids say I'm a tough old bird, and my husband calls me "Beautiful."
- Glad To Be Alive Dear Glad: Your husband is right - you are beautiful. God bless you.
Dear Abby: For the last 15 years, my wife has had a "friend" (I'll call her "Lucy") who has had marital (and other family) difficulties. Lucy calls my wife incessantly to complain about her problems, in spite of the fact that she is supposedly receiving professional help from multiple sources. She has kept my wife on the telephone for hours at a time.
Unfortunately, my wife is the sympathetic type, and she doesn't know how to permanently rid herself of this burden. She is also constantly doing favors such as marketing for Lucy, since she spends so much time feeling sorry for herself, she can't seem to get anything accomplished.
How do I free my wife from this parasite?- Frustrated and Angry
in Rochester, N.Y.
Dear Frustrated and Angry: You can't. If your wife permits herself to be constantly dumped on, SHE needs to get some instruction in assertiveness. I recommend it.
People are eating them up! For Abby's favorite recipes, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Cookbooklet No. 1, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)
1992 Universal Press Syndicate