Her female co-workers will be accused of sour grapes and her bosses will no doubt be compared to old prunes. But Carol Shaya, the 24-year-old cop who posed nude for the August issue of Playboy magazine, is the real fruitcake if, as she claims, she really didn't think that her lustful layout would affect her career with the New York Police Department.
Shaya faces possible suspension or dismissal for accepting this unauthorized off-duty employment, not to mention the improper use of her uniform. So far, though, she has simply been reassigned to a desk job at the Bronx Borough Command, mostly because the other female officers have complained about the verbal abuse they've taken since the issue appeared. It seems the bad guys prefer to be handcuffed by a bombshell.Now, I don't have a problem with Shaya's spread, or with Playboy magazine, for that matter. America is, after all, the land of the free and the home of the brave.
Still, it is always a bit bewildering to me when one of these women turns up a week or so after her daring debut expressing shock and severe mental distress because she's been dumped by her (choose one): A.) Employer B.) University C.) Spouse D.) Church choir.
"I never guessed that the reverend would disapprove," she says with a woeful sigh. "He's always been so supportive in the past."
You'll have to forgive my lack of sympathy. It is perhaps based on my own early realization that I would never, ever, be approached for a Playboy cartoon, much less a centerfold - despite the fact that I have both an identical twin and an old marching band uniform.
Alas, the magazine isn't much interested in our "type." There has never been a "Babes of the B Cup," "Moms of the Midwest" or "Women Who Look Exactly Their Age" issue. At least, not as far as I know. In an effort to better empathize with those more endowed, therefore, I can only try to picture what it must be like to bare your soul - and everything else - for a bunch of frustrated and sweaty men.
Toward this end, I considered (briefly) taking a walk down I-75 on a hot afternoon, clad in little more than a sturdy pair of spike heels and a WonderBra.
I am certain of two things, however: It would not make me feel especially good about myself, nor would I consider it a positive career move. I'm sure that there are as many motives for posing for Playboy magazine as there are women who have done so. There's the money, of course, and the notoriety. And there's always the good chance that you'll make lots of interesting new friends.
Impressing your employer, however, can hardly be rated at the top of the list of reasons to take a staple in the stomach. In this instance, to expect the New York Police Department to just look the other way is to expect a lot. Law enforcement is looking for role models, not lingerie models.
Not to mention the fact that the city has spent a lot of time and money training Shaya for her job as a patrolwoman. Unfortunately, she must have misunderstood that whole chapter on "The Proper Use of Sirens."