Guess what? There's another cable TV network coming online tonight, from our friends at Nickelodeon and Nick at Nite.
Called TV Land, it's sort of a 24-hour-a-day Nick at Nite.They've got your classic comedy - "The Phil Silvers Show," "Mister Ed," "Hogan's Heroes," "That Girl," "The Addams Family," "Green Acres," Petticoat Junction."
They've got your classic variety shows - "Ed Sullivan" and "The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour."
They've got some of the best dramas in the history of television - "Hill Street Blues," "St. Elsewhere" and "The White Shadow." They've got a classic Western - "Gunsmoke" - and classic detective shows like "Mannix" and "Cannon."
And that's just on the Monday-Friday schedule.
On the weekends, there are shows that haven't been available to most viewers for years - the original "Burke's Law," "Honey West," "Ace Crawford, P.I.," "Nero Wolfe," "Have Gun Will Travel" - even silly stuff like "Love, American Style."
About all it doesn't have is a channel on most of Utah's cable systems. And that stinks.
We can get a taste of TV Land tonight, when Nick at Nite airs the lineup beginning at 6 p.m. But, after that, we're shut out. Again.
And, frankly, this is getting more than a little bit annoying.
TCI - which serves the majority of the state's cable viewers - can see its way clear to raising our rates again. But as to actually adding channels that most of us want? That's another story.
The company line at TCI remains that it's a problem with channel capacity. That, once the new fiber optic system is in, we'll have lots more cable channels available.
Well, I, for one, am tired of hearing this. TCI representatives told me the new system would be on line by the end of 1993. Then it was 1994. Then it was 1995.
It's now 1996. And except for the Provo system and a portion of Salt Lake City, we're still waiting to see these fabulous fiber optics.
And those portions of Salt Lake City that have the new system online didn't get much of an upgrade. Oh, they got The Learning Channel and another shopping channel. And the Weather Channel and American Movie Classics were returned to the system full time - but that wasn't an addition, it was simply a restoration of service that had been previously interrupted.
As for the channels that viewers really want - Comedy Central, ESPN2, the History Channel, Sci-Fi, Turner Classic Movies and even TV Land - they're nowhere to be seen.
Oddly enough, there was room on the systems for TCI-owned movie channels Encore and Starz - channels that brought more direct revenue to TCI. But no channel capacity of non-TCI-owned channels.
In the meantime, TCI subscribers get to pay more for the same old channels, all the while being fed so-far empty promises about the future.
Personally, I'm sick of it.
I want my TV Land!
(Not to mention my Comedy Central, ESPN2, History Channel, Sci-Fi Channel, Turner Classic Movies, etc.)
TV TRIVIA TIME: During his 23-year-run on CBS, Ed Sullivan used to take a few weeks off each summer. And the network used to program other variety shows as sum-mer replacement series.
What was the very last summer replacement show for Ed, after his show was canceled in mid-1971? (See answer below.)
A BIT OF GOOD NEWS: There is one piece of good news for cable subscribers who are fans of classic comedy.
"Rhoda" is about to join the Nick at Nite lineup.
One of your local television editor's personal all-time favorites, this spinoff of "The Mary Tyler Moore" show ran for five years on CBS - 1974-79.
This was a show that actually got better as it went along. And after Rhoda (Valerie Harper) got a divorce from her husband, Joe (David Groh), whom she married to huge ratings in the series' eighth episode.
"Rhoda" kicks off its Nick at Nite run with a three-hour mini-marathon on Friday, May 10, at 6 p.m. Beginning the following Monday, the show will be seen weeknights at 8:30 p.m. (right after "Mary") and midnight.
Can't wait.
SWITCHING NETWORKS? Speculation about the future of ABC's "Murder One" has taken an interesting turn of late. Rumors have begun that the show will indeed return in the fall - but on CBS.
And, while such speculation is rather premature, it's also at least within the realm of possibilities. For several reasons.
- There does appear to be some life in the show. The two hours that aired Monday and the one-hour episode on Tuesday did rather well in the ratings.
- ABC doesn't really have a good place to put the show. It's a 9 p.m. drama, and that time slot is already locked up on ABC on five nights of the week. Sundays are a movie night. Mondays belong to "Monday Night Football." On Tuesdays, it's "NYPD Blue." Wednesdays are the home of "PrimeTime Live." And Friday is the domain of "20/20."
That leaves Thursdays - where "Murder One" was murdered by NBC's "ER." And Saturdays, which seem rather unlikely for a continuing drama like "Murder One."
ABC Entertainment President Ted Harbert has talked about the possibility of holding the show back until January, after the end of football season, and then returning it to Mondays at 9 p.m. But "Murder One" got beat up by "Chicago Hope" after moving to Mondays this year.
("Chicago Hope" didn't air this past Monday, when "Murder" man-aged to beat "Picket Fences.")
So a return to ABC doesn't seem terribly likely.
- CBS, on the other hand, doesn't have the "problem" of having established hits in 9 p.m. time slots. Sundays will, in all likelihood, remain devoted to movies. "Chicago Hope" looks set on Mondays, and "Nash Bridges" will probably remain on Fridays.
But Tuesdays and Wednesdays are both open. (Although Bochco probably wouldn't be thrilled about having "Murder One" compete against another of his shows, "NYPD Blue," on that night.)
And CBS could make a season-long commitment to "Murder One," promising to put it on the air in September, not January.
- It's also possible that ABC, not wanting the show to go to CBS, could take a second look at "Murder One" and pick the show up for a second season.
And there's precedent for that. When the producers of "Rose-anne" started talking to CBS earlier this year, ABC changed its mind and renewed that show for the fall.
- Last, and certainly not least, is the fact that "Murder One" was the last series that Bochco did for ABC under the terms of a long-running contract with that network. He now has a long-term contract to provide shows for another network.
And that network is none other than CBS.
Again, all of this is speculation. But a week ago, the conventional wisdom was that "Murder One" didn't stand a chance of returning in the fall under any circumstances.
Today, the odds have turned more in the show's favor. They may still be less than 50-50, but they're a lot higher than zero.
Let's hope that, one way or another - one network or the other - that "Murder One" gets a shot at a sophomore season.
Stay tuned . . . .
AND THE ANSWER IS: The last summer replacement for Ed Sullivan was "The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour," which aired from early August through mid-September 1971.
"Sonny and Cher" returned to the CBS schedule in December of that year, where it remained until Sonny and Cher divorced in 1974.
"The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour" is also the answer to another trivia question - it was the last variety show to finish a season in the Top 10 in the ratings. It tied "Kojack" for No. 7 in 1973-74.
("The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour" is not to be confused with "The Sonny and Cher Show," which reteamed the by-then divorced couple in 1976-77 and met with considerably less success in the ratings.)