Where's Izzy?
It's a game we're playing here, and it's not unlike "Where's Waldo?" Only this game isn't played out in a book. It's played out on the streets of Atlanta during the Olympics, as people wonder aloud why the only Izzy they ever see is that stuffed doll in the stores and kiosks. (The small version is $15; the larger one closer to $30.)It's a fair question. After all, the Utah Jazz mascot - the Bear - is always at the Delta Center during basketball games. Mickey Mouse is never missing from Disneyland or Disney World. Would you go to Jurassic Park and expect the dinosaurs to be on vacation?
So why shouldn't we expect to find the fuzzy, blue, wide-eyed official Olympic mascot, Izzy, waving to the crowds at sports venues? Or maybe in Centennial Park, meeting and greeting young children? Or squeezing into a MARTA train, so he can get to the Underground mall in time for the Brooks & Dunn concert?
Maybe Izzy's just not a mingler. Maybe he doesn't want to be associated with all those other celebrities being spotted around town.
And who can blame him?
Would you want to be photographed with Demi Moore (she's bald, you know) or Brooke Shields (she has a new sitcom, you know) or Bo Derek (she's . . . well, she's Bo Derek . . . you know)?
On the other hand, maybe Izzy is afraid of getting run over by that stretch Humvee that can't turn corners downtown. That's right, a stretch Humvee - a sort of non-RV Humvee. And since it's parked in front of the House of Blues, I'm assuming it belongs to Dan Aykroyd instead of Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Although, Schwarzenegger is in town. And so is Bruce Willis. And Tony Bennett. And Jerry Seinfeld, Spike Lee, David Hasselhoff, Ted and Jane (Turner and Fonda), Donald and Marla (Trump and Maples), the Gumbels (Bryant and Greg) - even Hootie (with, or without, the Blowfish).
But Izzy is absent, and it's especially noticeable during Atlanta's Mardi Gras atmosphere, when you might run into Batman, Chewbacca or a Power Ranger on any street corner at any time of the day or night.
No, there has to be some other reason that Izzy is missing in action - and I'm convinced it's a combination of two things. First, it's all the bad press he's getting. And second, it's fear that his origins will be discovered.
Let's face it, Izzy is not the most beloved mascot in sports history. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution called him "butt-ugly." Time magazine referred to him as the "amorphous, computer-generated, somewhat indeterminate Olympic mascot, Whatizit." And TV Guide called him "goofy." (Like TV Guide has room to talk.)
Meanwhile, the mascot's official Olympic biography suggests that Izzy lives in a "fantastic world inside the Olympic flame." Right. That sounds more like the Mario Bros. in a new video game. (One more item the Olympic committee should be marketing any day now.)
Then there's Andrew Young's explanation. In a recent interview, the former Atlanta mayor/current co-chairman of the Atlanta Olympic Committee said: "Our young people are probably going to have to deal with creatures from outer space. Izzy is breeding a new level of tolerance for things that look different from you and me. It's a weird little futuristic creature that you have to learn to love."
Creatures from outer space! Izzy is a creature from outer space?
No wonder he can't be found. Put yourself in his place.
You're a blue space creature in America as "Independence Day" fever grips an already alien-phobic society.
Wouldn't you be in hiding, too?