Yeah, sure. She's Michael Jordan's mom.
But before that, she was Ronald Jordan's mom, Deloris Jordan's mom and Larry Jordan's mom. And after that, she was Roslyn Jordan's mom, too.That's why Deloris Jordan never ceases to be amazed when overeager parents - anxious to produce the next basketball superstar - ask how many hours she made Michael spend each day shooting hoops in the back yard, or which sports camp she sent him to in the summer.
"Those people have it all wrong," she says. "Before the world knew Michael, Michael had a family. And sports were simply something we enjoyed together, as a family, beginning with Little League.
"For Mr. Jordan and me, sports were not the top priority - our five children were. We didn't set out to produce great athletes. We set out to raise good, responsible people. We encouraged participation in sports because it was fun, and with sports, we always knew where our kids were, what they were doing, and who they were with."
But meeting all those pushy parents, pressuring their kids to excel at things for all the wrong reasons, made Deloris Jordan worry. Her concern grew in 1989, when she became president of the Michael Jordan Foundation for disadvantaged youth, and came in contact with too many kids without parents keeping tabs on them at all.
Then, in 1993, her husband, James Raymond "Ray" Jordan, was murdered during a carjacking by a 21-year-old ex-con and his 20-year-old accomplice. As a widow, Deloris Jordan felt firsthand the horrific impact of kids growing up without appropriate adult supervision.
So she finally decided to write a book, "Family First: Winning the Parenting Game" (HarperCollins, $18), co-authored with Gregg Lewis and filled with common-sense tips on how to raise successful, caring kids.
"I don't consider myself an expert when it comes to parenting advice," says Jordan. "But being Michael Jordan's mother has given me a platform to speak out." And speak out she does. And some of the things she says may be hard for '90s parents to swallow. A sampling:
- "I hear people complain all the time, `It's so hard being a mother (or father) today!' What do they expect? I don't know any good parents who ever thought it was easy."
- "Quality time can't completely make up for lost quantity time ... many of the most crucial quality times parents have with children can't be scheduled. They just happen."
- "Career women who are mothers need to decide what their first priority is in life. When a child is grown and gone and you can't remember the special things they've done, will money make up for it?"
Deloris and Ray Jordan raised their brood in Wilmington, N.C., in middle-class surroundings. Ray Jordan worked at the GE plant, which manufactured airplane parts, and eventually became parts manager there. Deloris Jordan's first job was with the Corning Glass Works plant, working mostly evenings and juggling childcare responsibilities with Ray.
When that took its toll - Jordan says she couldn't shake the feeling that she was missing prime time with her kids - she quit.
A few years later, Jordan went back to work again, this time at United Carolina Bank, and with the understanding there that she could work through coffee and lunch breaks and leave early enough to get to school conferences or take the kids to after-school activities.
Indeed, one of the concerns she raises in "Family First" is that parents tend to "loosen the grip" when kids reach middle school and beyond. It's easy to find room mothers in kindergarten, she says; where have they gone by junior high?
"Parents need to understand that though their relationship with their child changes - from mama and daddy with a young child to teacher with a teen to friend with an adult child - they still need to be involved," she says.
Jordan sold cookies door-to-door with her daughters for Girl Scouts and the cheerleading squad. She watched her sons in high school Junior ROTC parades and endless softball and basketball games. She insisted that homework be done after school before anyone watched TV or played with a friend. And she meted out discipline when it was needed.
Like the time eighth-grader Michael was suspended for three days for leaving the school campus to buy candy at the drugstore across the street. He spent his suspension in her car, parked next to her office window, completing his school assignments.
"He tells me now that that could be considered child abuse," she laughs. "But he never got suspended again."
And when Jordan talks about "being there" for children, even grown-up kids, she means it - physically and emotionally.
When Michael left the University of North Carolina at 19 to play for the Chicago Bulls, guess who went to Chicago with him? For his entire rookie year?
"I felt he needed a home environment. I wanted to make sure he kept his head on straight."
Of course, being there isn't all there is to being a good parent. Here are some of Jordan's other tips:
- Communicate: Communicate to your children your unconditional love and support, says Jordan, and listen not only to what they say, but to cues and clues to what is going on in their world.
"Part of communication is encouraging children to dream and set goals," says Jordan. "I used to tell my kids they each have special talents. It's how hard you work with your God-given talent that determines where you end up.
"I remember Michael watching the basketball competition during the 1972 Olympic Games in Munich. He told me someday he would play in the Olympics, too," she says. "I agreed it would be nice - never thinking his dream might actually come true. It did - with a lot of hard work."
But Jordan also remembers the day when Michael, then a high school sophomore, came home with the news that he'd been cut from the varsity basketball team.
"I saw the hurt ... . I told him to go back and discipline himself. But I also told him if he worked hard and still didn't achieve his goal, it just wasn't meant to be," she says.
- Show love and affection: Don't just tell your children you love them. Show them with hugs and kisses, says Jordan. And demonstrate love through sacrifice, putting your children's needs above your own.
- Make your home a safe haven: Home should be a secure place to which your children are always welcome to return.
- Build a parenting team: Even single parents can rely on teachers, coaches, doctors and churches to help them raise their children and instill values.
- Give gifts of character: Empathy, perseverance, integrity, independence, responsibility, confidence - these are all priceless gifts every parent can give, says Jordan.