The best 10 movies of 1997?
No problem.In the order they came to Salt Lake theaters: The "Star Wars" trilogy, "Walkabout," "The Godfather," "Vertigo," "North By Northwest," "The Big Sleep," "Contempt" and "The Little Mermaid."
What? Reissues don't count?
Well, that does make it tougher. Let's face it, 1997 was a remarkably shallow year.
Can I buck tradition and do a "Top Four' list instead of a "Top Ten"?
No?
Oh, all right then.
My favorite movie of 1997 was "Ulee's Gold," a heartfelt, character-driven story with a singularly, and unexpectedly, fabulous performance by the actor who has always been considered the least of the Fondas, Peter.
And at the other end of the scale, the picture I most disliked, was "Starship Troopers," with gross-out giant bugs ripping human beings apart, and a screenplay that wallows in idiotic, "Melrose Place" soap-opera machinations. Local sesquicentennial road shows delivered better performances.
As for the rest, here we go:
THE REST OF THE BEST
2. "The Whole Wide World." Wonderfully written, superbly acted romance is a true story, however unlikely it may seem, as two independent writers collide in rural Texas during the 1930s. Vincent D'Onofrio and Renee Zellweger are both terrific. (Technically a 1996 movie that opened here in February.)
3. "When We Were Kings." The Oscar-winner as best documentary this year (which also received attention at the Sundance Film Festival), about Muhammad Ali and George Foreman squaring off in 1974 for the Zaire "Rumble in the Jungle." Wildly entertaining. (Another 1996 movie that opened here in May.)
4. "Shall We Dance?" This light, deceptively simple Japanese comedy-drama, about a staid businessman who takes ballroom dancing lessons on the sly, grows on you. One of those rare movies that is better the second and third time around. (In Japanese, with English subtitles.)
5. "As Good As It Gets." Edgy, perilous and perhaps the most unlikely candidate for the year's best comedy, this sharp effort by James L. Brooks ("Terms of Endearment," "Broadcast News") probably couldn't have worked nearly as well with any actor other than Jack Nicholson in the unlikable lead. But it's both bitingly funny and charmingly poignant, despite some iffy elements.
6. "In the Company of Men." Here's another extremely dark comedy-drama, and it's an argument starter. But Neil LaBute's first movie is also startlingly original, with a screenplay that couldn't be better written and an attitude that will send you out of the theater with divided thoughts.
7. "Kolya." This stunning, admittedly sentimental film is the story of a classical musician, a lifelong, womanizing bachelor, who is forced to take in a young child, forging an unexpected bond between the two. (In Czech and Russian, with English subtitles.) (Technically a 1996 film that opened here in March.)
8. "Wag the Dog." A hilarious dark satire about the thin line between politics and entertainment, as a presidential advisor (Robert De Niro) enlists the aid of a Hollywood producer (Dustin Hoffman) to help re-elect a president whose ratings are flagging. Hysterical. (Scheduled to open in local theaters Jan. 9.)
9. "Good Will Hunting." Profane but moving, occasionally silly and sometimes quite wise, this comedy-drama, written by young independents Matt Damon and Ben Affleck (and starring Damon, who is also currently in "John Grisham's The Rainmaker") is as frustrating as it is enjoyable, but Damon and Robin Williams' performances make it worthwhile.
10. "Hercules." It helps to look at Disney's twisted, animated take on Greek mythology as a wacky, off-the-wall farce that makes fun of our obsession with product endorsements. What can I say? I laughed a lot.
Runners-up include "Sling Blade," "Children of the Revolution," "Hard 8," "GRIDLOCK'd," "Mrs. Brown" and "The Full Monty."
Sadly, local critics didn't get to see some of the films that are making waves with critics on the coasts - Robert Duvall's "The Apostle," "The Winter Guest" with Emma Thompson, Alan Rudolph's "Afterglow," etc. Consequently, they could not be considered here.
THE REST OF THE WORST
2. "8 Heads in a Duffel Bag." One of the worst dark comedies ever, with Joe Pesci trying to breathe some life into an awful screenplay about murder and mayhem. Painful.
3. "Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery." A big hit for Mike Myers, but his simple-minded, vulgar gags wore out their welcome with me quite rapidly.
4. "G.I. Jane." Bald Demi battling male chauvinist SEALS by become equally crass and macho. Director Ridley Scott seems to be imitating brother Tony.
5. "Gone Fishin'." Joe Pesci again, here teamed with Danny Glover as dumb-and-dumber fishing buddies mixed up with killers.
6. "I Know What You Did Last Summer." Another big hit for screenwriter Kevin Williamson, but it's just a dumb slasher picture embracing the cliches he spoofed in "Scream" and "Scream 2."
7. "Alien Resurrection." Horrid sequel to the equally horrid "Alien3." These pictures seem to be designed to make us realize just how good "Alien" and "Aliens" were.
8. "A Simple Wish." Idiotic children's fantasy with Martin Short as a "fairy godmother" doing battle with evil Kathleen Turner. One of too many stupid kids pictures this year.
9. "Event Horizon." Gory ripoff of "Alien," crossed with "Hellraiser," wasting a fine cast (Laurence Fishburne, Sam Neill, Kathleen Quinlan). A high-tech splatter film.
10. "McHale's Navy." What would the "Worst 10" list be without a Tom Arnold movie? This remake/sequel makes the old TV series seem intelligent.
Runners-up include "The Saint," "George of the Jungle," "The Relic," "Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie," "Anaconda," "Kull the Conqueror," "Fire Down Below," "B*A*P*S," "Fierce Creatures," "Turbulence," "Shadow Conspiracy," "Dante's Peak," "Private Parts," "'til there was you," "Murder at 1600," "Warriors of Virtue," "Money Talks," "Gang Related," "RocketMan," "Switchback," "Playing God," "The Jackal," "Home Alone 3" and more.
*****
ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
Jeff Vice's Best
1. When We Were Kings
2. The Ice Storm
3. Ponette
4. Good Will Hunting
5. The Wings of the Dove
6. Wag the Dog
7. Prisoner of the Mountains
8. Ulee's Gold
9. Fast, Cheap & Out of Control
10. In the Company of Men
Chris Hicks' Best
1. Ulee's Gold
2. The Whole Wide World
3. When We Were Kings
4. Shall We Dance?
5. As Good As It Gets
6. In the Company of Men
7. Kolya
8. Wag the Dog
9. Good Will Hunting
10. Hercules
Jeff Vice's Worst
1. Mr. Magoo
2. Meet Wally Sparks
3. Mortal Kombat Annihilation
4. Good Burger
5. Timothy Leary's Dead
6. Def Jam's How to Be a Player
7. Spike & Mike's Sick and Twisted Festival of Animation '97
8. Starship Troopers
9. An American Werewolf in Paris
10. The Postman
Chris Hicks' Worst
1. Starship Troopers
2. 8 Heads in a Duffel Bag
3. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery
4. G.I. Jane
5. Gone Fishin'
6. I Know What You Did Last Summer
7. Alien Resurrection
8. A Simple Wish
9. Event Horizon
10. McHale's Navy