Remember when the cast and crew of "Walker, Texas Ranger" were in Utah filming a couple of episodes back in August? Maybe that wasn't such a good thing.In the episode scheduled for Saturday, Nov. 7 - an episode shot in the Park City area - Alex (Sheree J. Wilson) is camping in Utah when she's kidnapped by the "crazy Trammel brothers." Walker (Chuck Norris) and his buddies, of course, set out to save her.
Mind you, the episode wasn't just shot in Utah, it's set in Utah. And everyone knows our mountains are filled with "crazy brothers" who run around kidnapping people.
Just what we need - another TV show depicting Utah as a haven for lunatics.
GERALDO ON NBC: NBC, which is paying Geraldo Rivera boatloads of money to do a pair of shows on cable's CNBC, has scheduled the first of his network news specials for this coming Sunday.
"Blacks and Blues," an hour about the relationship between blacks and the police, will be seen at 6 p.m. - right up against CBS's juggernaut "60 Minutes." (Yeah, good luck, Geraldo.)
You may recall the first time Rivera hosted an alleged news special on NBC back in the early '80s - a big "expose" on the occult. Then-NBC president Brandon Tartikoff publicly apologized for it after it aired.
And now Geraldo's back. How's that for irony?
NO "MERCY": "Mercy Point," UPN's bizarre new futuristic medical drama set in outer space, is on life support. The network-wannabe has yanked the show - its third and final scheduled airing was Tuesday.
The series hasn't been outright canceled, at least not yet. "Mercy Point" has been sent on hiatus, but there's no word when (or if) it might return.
Not that much of anyone would care, given the extremely anemic ratings.
Beginning next week, UPN will fill the time slot with a pair of half-hour programs:
- "America's Greatest Pets" (Tuesdays, 8 p.m.), a reality show.
- And "Reunited" (Tuesdays, 8:30 p.m.), a sitcom about a family that's knocked for a loop when a long-lost daughter - given up for adoption 20 years earlier - suddenly shows up on the doorstep.
JUST WONDERING: Comedy Central executives and the producers of "South Park" continually insist that the show is not aimed at children and, thus, the vulgarity and profanity is not a problem.
Why, then, are the stores inundated with plush toys depicting the various "South Park" characters? This would be for the big adult audience interested in stuffed dolls?
IN TROUBLE: So far this season, it's six shows down and who-knows-how-many left to go.
Fox has canceled "Costello" and "Getting Personal," and has sent "Holding the Baby" and "Living in Captivity" on hiatus.
CBS has canceled "The Brian Benben Show."
UPN has sent "Mercy Point" on hiatus.
But there are other shows in a lot of trouble in the ratings. They're all prime candidates for cancellation - indeed, some of them might be canceled by the time today's newspaper is delivered.
The troubled bunch includes:
- "Conrad Bloom" on NBC, which is doing even worse than "Suddenly Susan" and "Caroline in the City." And both of them are doing much worse this season than they did last season.
The only one of NBC's four Monday-night sitcoms showing any signs of life is "Will & Grace" - which was doing quite nicely at "Brian Benben's" expense.
- "Sports Night" on ABC, which is doing quite poorly. As I feared before the season began, this high-quality program is perhaps suffering because it's not a traditional sitcom - it's more of a half-hour drama with comedic elements.
Viewers always say they want to see something different, but usually when something different comes along those same viewers reject it in favor of traditional programming.
- "To Have and to Hold" on CBS, proving that cute and funny and charming isn't always enough.
- "Vengeance Unlimited" on ABC, proving that sometimes bad things happen to bad shows.
- "Buddy Faro" on CBS, proving that a good show in a bad time slot is a tough sell.
- Both "Fantasy Island" and "Cupid" on ABC, proving that even really good shows have a tough time finding an audience on Saturday nights.
BAD MOVE? The really bold scheduling move Fox made this season was shifting "King of the Hill" from Sundays after "The Simpsons" to lead-off hitter on Tuesdays.
So far, it doesn't look like such a great move.
Oh, Fox has had some success with "That '70s Show," which is now airing after "The Simpsons." It's a moderate success, and the network has renewed it through the end of the season.
"King of the Hill," on the other hand, has seen its ratings collapse since moving to Tuesdays. A genuine hit on Sundays, it ranks No. 82 in the ratings this season.
Fox isn't going to make any immediate changes, hoping that "King" can grow on Tuesdays. But that's looking less likely with each passing week
DIGITALLY SPEAKING: PBS is trumpeting the fact that, during the week of Nov. 9, seven local PBS stations will begin airing digital broadcasts. (None of which is anywhere near Utah.)
CBS is trumpeting the fact that it will telecast the Nov. 18 episode of "Chicago Hope" in the HDTV format on 11 of its stations. (None of which is anywhere near Utah.)
Of course, the fact is that almost no one out there actually owns an HDTV set . . . which makes all of this somewhat less exciting news.
DOUBLE TROUBLE Hmmmm . . . what could be worse than watching an episode of the WB's incredibly awful sitcom "The Army Show"? How about an episode of the incredibly awful "Army Show" featuring the incredibly annoying Bobcat Goldthwait as a guest star?
It's actually going to happen on Sunday.
If you're looking for a reason to get rid of your TV set, this could be it.
QUOTABLE: "Late Night" host Conan O'Brien: "Kathie Lee Gifford announced that starting next month she's going to sing the opening theme of her show. Regis Philbin announced that starting next month he's going to be late for work every day."