There was a time when the idea of a Thomas the Tank Engine movie would have been a good one. Unfortunately for the makers of "Thomas and the Magic Railroad," that time is not now.
Not only has the television series "Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends" lost much of its audience (and been replaced by "Teletubbies," among other shows), but this children's fantasy-adventure has too much strong box-office competition, including the new "Pokmon" film and "Chicken Run."
And while it's certainly more acceptable fare for kids than the former (it's considerably sweeter and decidedly less violent), it's not nearly as clever and imaginative as the latter.
In fact, the big-screen "Thomas" doesn't even come close to being as charming as its sources (the television series and British author Wilbert Awdry's beloved tales). And for a significant chunk of time, it seems to forget who the real star is and instead concentrates on the considerably less appealing human characters.
Much of the story revolves around Mr. Conductor (Alec Baldwin, replacing Ringo Starr), the diminutive train engineer who takes care of Thomas and his fellow steam engines.
It seems he's lost his "sparkle," the magical ability to travel between the Island of Sodor, the tiny toy world inhabited by Thomas and the other trains, and the scenic town of Shining Time, which he calls home.
To be more specific, his supply of magical Gold Dust is dwindling, as is the life energy on the Island of Sodor. And the only thing that can restore both is a magical steam-train engine that's been missing for years.
So it's up to Thomas (voiced by John Bellis) and the others to find the lost engine before it's too late. However, they do have one big obstacle — the evil Diesel No. 10, who wants to eliminate the steam engines once and for all.
This should be the main story line, but what dominates the film is a much-less-interesting subplot about Burnett Stone (a surprisingly lethargic Peter Fonda), the lost train's owner, and his granddaughter (Mara Wilson).
Also, first-time filmmaker Britt Allcroft (a producer and director of the television series) is unable to bring much energy to the proceedings, and, aside from the downright hammy Baldwin, none of the cast members seems to be having that much fun.
Add to that the fact that the plot's pretty confusing, even for adults, and you've got a relatively brief film that seems much longer than it actually is.
But again, there are worse and much more inappropriate kids' films out there.
"Thomas and the Magic Railroad" is rated G, though it does feature scenes of mild violence and menace. Running time: 85 minutes.
E-MAIL: jeff@desnews.com