It was as if Michelle Kwan had spent the last six months preparing America for what happened at the Salt Lake Ice Center Thursday night.
Even though hearts around the world broke when Kwan, the 1998 Olympic silver medalist, fell out of gold-medal contention here at the Salt Lake City Games, the feeling was one of sadness, rather than injustice. But immediately after her bronze-medal performance, she also left open the door to another Winter Games in another country — 2006 in Torino, Italy.
Kwan began this Olympic season by turning the sport on its head. She dumped her coach and her choreographer. She stopped talking about winning competitions and started talking about living life on her own terms.
She seemed unsteady at times, losing to the newly crowned Olympic gold and silver medalists, American Sarah Hughes and Russian Irina Slutskaya. But, she also showed signs of brilliance, as in her performances at the 2002 U.S. Championship, where she won her sixth national title.
When she finished third at the Delta Center (Salt Lake Ice Center) Thursday night, her face belied her disappointment and in speaking to reporters afterward Kwan would not rule out competing four years from now in the 2006 Winter Games.
Thursday night was an ugly flashback to her 1998 loss to upstart American Tara Lipinski — she had been beaten by another teenager, who came through with another shoot-from-the-hip performance. And, again, she left knowing she hadn't quite put everything she had out there for the judges to judge.
"I made a mistake early on in the program, and I just heard the audience clap for me, trying to root me on," Kwan said. "Tonight was just not my night. It was a bummer."
The night was a bummer for Kwan fans everywhere. The third tier on the podium had become unfamiliar territory for one of the sport's most-decorated champions.
But perhaps it wasn't as big a surprise — or as heartbreakingly sad — as it could have been. Because all along, during the bumpy journey she took to get to Salt Lake City, Kwan has held steadfastly to what she said was most important: her life, her loves, her passion. She didn't quit, and whatever she did, she did it her way.
"I have to shrug my shoulders and say it's life," she said, her voice heavy-laden. "This is all about competition. You don't skate well every night."
E-mail: jnii@desnews.com