We can only hope that "swimfan" sinks without a trace. Otherwise we could see a whole slew of like-minded and similarly awful rip-offs of earlier — much-better — hit films.
For the benefit of those who couldn't guess from the overly revealing trailers and TV spots, this would-be thriller is little more than a re-do of 1987's "Fatal Attraction," but aimed at a much-younger crowd.
Unfortunately for the film — and its target audience — "swimfan" has a lot more in common with "Cruel Intentions," the ludicrous 1999 drama that was roundly panned for being, essentially, "Young Dangerous Liaisons."
But "swimfan" is even worse, utilizing plot contrivances that are so ridiculous that the film eventually becomes campy. (If "swimfan" does catch on, it may be because teens are looking for something to make them laugh.)
The title character is Madison Bell (Erika Christensen), "the new girl in town," who almost immediately latches onto New Jersey teen Ben Cronin (Jesse Bradford).
It appears that the once-troubled Ben isn't interested, though. Instead, he's devoted to Amy (Shiri Appleby, from the canceled TV series "Roswell"), a fellow student who has encouraged him to continue his competitive swimming (he's even getting interest from college scouts).
In a moment of weakness, however, Ben allows Madison to seduce him. He regrets it almost immediately, but by then it's too late — especially when she begins to relentlessly pursue him by e-mail and telephone.
When Ben finally tells Madison their encounter was a mistake, her actions become even more malicious, and downright deadly — not just for him, but also for his friends and family.
As irritating as some of the quick-cut editing and MTV-style direction is, the movie's most severe problems are its script (written by a pair of relative newcomers) and the terrible performances by the leads. Bradford is usually likable, but as Ben, he's surprisingly unsympathetic (his five-o'clock shadow also makes him look like one of the oldest high school students in history). And Christensen, so memorable in 2000's "Traffic," is laughable as a psychotic stalker (ya gotta love her bug-eyed evil leer).
"Swimfan" is rated PG-13 for violence (a choking, shootings, attempted bludgeonings and violence against women), simulated sex, scattered use of strong profanity, brief drug content (prescription drug abuse), use of some crude sexual slang terms, brief gore and brief glimpses of nude photos. Running time: 85 minutes.
E-MAIL: jeff@desnews.com