Every time you think "Timeline" can't get any stupider, it does. That might sound like a complaint, but in its own awful way, this film is entertaining . . . albeit ludicrously entertaining.

No film in recent memory has cried out this much to be mocked. Judging from the atrocious dialogue, the Z-grade acting, the chintzy production values and the head-scratching plot, you'd swear "Timeline" was intended to be a comedy instead of a science-fiction thriller. Or that it was assembled by monkeys — and not particularly talented monkeys. (Actually, it was allegedly directed by Richard Donner, a veteran director who's made some good movies in his career, going all the way back to 1978's "Superman.")

Come to think of it, performing monkeys could probably offer up a better performance than the film's cardboard cutout star, Paul Walker. He plays Chris Johnston, the son of world-renowned archaeologist Edward Johnston (Billy Connolly), who finds himself in the role of rescuer when Dad goes missing.

It seems Dad has been sent back in time, to 14th-century France. However, Chris and other members of the rescue team (including Gerard Butler and Neal McDonough) have just six hours to locate him and bring him back. Otherwise they'll all be stuck in the past.

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Among the film's more absurd concepts is that the time machine shown here actually uses some sort of fax technology. But while you're trying to wrap your head around that one, consider that it's also trying to pass off bleached-blond Walker as son of Scottish comic actor Connolly. Yeah, right.

Needless to say, none of this is convincing. Nor is the contrived romance between Walker's character and a fellow archaeologist played by Frances O'Connor.

"Timeline" is rated PG-13 for violence (swordplay, stabbings, arrow fire and explosive mayhem), scattered use of strong profanity (including one usage of the so-called "R-rated" curse word) and brief gore. Running time: 116 minutes.


E-MAIL: jeff@desnews.com

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