If the makers of "What a Girl Wants" were really being honest about their intentions, they would title it "Everything a 13-Year-Old Girl Wants to See in a Movie."
This all-too-derivative preteen comedy does everything within its power to please its obvious target demographic. But whether anyone outside of that group can embrace it depends on their tolerance for cutesiness and predictability.
It wouldn't hurt if the film's brand of humor consisted of more than just pratfalls, or if the story wasn't so padded with musical interludes. It's also a bit too similar to Disney's "The Princess Diaries" and "The Parent Trap." If that's not enough, the film also strands a pretty good cast in a by-the-numbers plot.
TV star Amanda Bynes (Nickelodeon's "The Amanda Show") stars as Daphne Reynolds, a free-spirited American teen who should be exploring her college options. But instead, she's obsessed with the father she never knew. It seems that Daphne is the product of a fling between her equally free-spirited mother
(Kelly Preston) and an Englishman who doesn't even know she exists.
So the 17-year-old heads to Merry Olde England in search of her dad, who turns out to be Henry Dashwood (Colin Firth), a high-profile British politician in the middle of a campaign for the House of Lords. Henry is also engaged to marry the rather snooty Glynnis Payne (Anna Chancellor). So the last thing he needs is for the daughter he never knew to show up and make a ruckus in the British press.
There are also subplots about Glynnis' even more snooty daughter (Christina Cole) and a British musician (Oliver James) who romances Daphne, which play out exactly as you suspect.
None of this would matter if the film were better paced, or better directed. Dennie Gordon, who is making her feature-filmmaking debut, has no real sense of comic timing. That forces her cast to play things a bit more broadly than they should — especially Bynes, who is usually more charming than she is here. And Firth looks a bit embarrassed, not that anyone can blame him.
"What a Girl Wants" is rated PG for slapstick violence (mostly pratfalls), mild profanity (mostly religiously based) and an occasional vulgar reference. Running time: 104 minutes.
E-MAIL: jeff@desnews.com