Rock 'n' roll's princess of darkness — Kelly Osbourne (Ozzy's daughter) and Lisa Marie Presley (the King's daughter) — have released solo albums.
Osbourne's "Shut Up," released on Epic, pales like a vampire compared to Presley's Capitol Records debut, "To Whom It May Concern."
When Osbourne's album hit the racks a few months ago, I took it for a spin. After two listens, I haven't been able to put it back into my CD player. It's a cross between Kim Wylde and Wendy O. Williams. I love those two singers, but I don't like Osbourne.
Presley's disc is different. It's a lot better than I expected. She has this crunchy Sheryl Crow-meets-Linda Ronstadt thing going. And it's pretty infectious.
Before these albums were released, the press turned on the hype. Osbourne and Presley's interviews with various music magazines and TV talk shows, along with TV spots, music-store teasers and online ads were everywhere.
I got to thinking. What would have happened if Kelly's last name was Johnson? What if Presley was born a Cleaver?
Is having famous parents a good thing?
When the blues-band Bloodline emerged back in 1994, it featured three sons of famous rockers — guitarist Waylon Krieger (son of Robby Krieger, of the Doors), drummer Erin Davis (Miles Davis's son) and bassist Berry Oakley Jr. (son of Allman Brothers bassist Berry Oakley Sr.). They joined forces as Bloodline with guitar prodigy "Smokin' Joe" Bonamassa and keyboardist Lou Segreti to release a bluesy self-titled debut.
While press materials for Bloodline touted the three famous children, the album failed miserably. But then again, this was in the wake of the Seattle sound uprising, and Pearl Jam was on the verge of becoming the biggest rock band in the world.
Which brings us to Jason Bonham. The much maligned drummer — son of Led Zeppelin's John Bonham — has never escaped his famous father's shadow. He's released a couple of albums — including "In the Name of My Father: the Zep-Set Live at Electric Ladyland" — but has received cold reviews.
Sure, some kids have found respect — Arlo Guthrie and Jakob Dylan, for example. Drummer Jamin Wilcox (son of Utopia drummer Willie Wilcox) has found moderate success in his band Audiovent.
Then there was singer/songwriter Jeff Buckley, who died in 1997, the son of folk singer Tim Buckley. The younger Buckley didn't want to use his famous last name, but the record company made him. Buckley's debut album "Grace" went platinum, and to his credit, he still wouldn't talk about his famous father.
But for the most part, it's just hard following a famous parent's footsteps.
The Osmond's Second Generation, Aaron Hagar (Sammy's son), A.J. Croce (Jim's son) and Adam Cohen (Leonard's son) have all tried to reach fame and fortune. Only the Osmond's Second Generation has found a regular gig, albeit in Branson, Mo., as part of the family show.
Being the daughters of Ravi Shankar could have been like living in a pressure cooker, but Anoushka has made a name as a seasoned sitar player, much like her father, and her half-sister Norah Jones won a basketful of Grammys earlier this year. And to think, Jones used her mother's last name.
So, what if "Shut Up" was released by a girl name Kelly Johnson?
Or "To Whom It May Concern" was the debut of someone named Lisa Marie Cleaver?
Would you buy them?
E-MAIL: scott@desnews.com