Her water bottle was full of vodka and her pockets were stuffed with uppers and downers. Still, Miranda Millward didn't think she had a problem.
So what if she was only 13 the first time she smoked marijuana? It was her life. If she wanted to skip school and go drinking with her friends, who could stop her? If she wanted to sneak out of the house late at night to sample a few new drugs, why should anybody care?
The trouble was, somebody did care. Desperate to save their daughter, Miranda's parents checked her into an adolescent day treatment center in North Salt Lake.
"I was so angry that they did that," says Miranda, now 16. "In fact, I was high when they brought me here. You look at the picture of me on my first day and my skin is gray. All I lived on was drugs. I really didn't care what happened to me."
Seven months later, Miranda's future seems as rosy as her complexion. She's kicked the drug habit, found a new set of friends and is into her second month as a high school junior.
Eager to share her story in the hope of inspiring other troubled teens, she wanted to join me for a Free Lunch at the Life-Line center with a few of her new friends: Katrina Gonzales, 16, Andrew Earley, 17, and Lyle Jennings, 19, a group counselor who was once a drug deal away from living in prison.
Listening to them laugh and talk over sloppy joes and milk, it seems impossible that they were lost in a spiral of drug and alcohol abuse. But ask any of them if drugs are really that prevalent in our schools, and you'll get four incredulous looks.
"They're everywhere," says Andrew, who went to a private school filled with the children of upper-crust families. "If you want it, you can get it. Even in elementary school, you can find crystal meth."
Andrew ended up at Life-Line seven months ago, after his parents found marijuana in his pants and had him arrested.
"Today, I know it's the best thing they could have done," he says. "The main reason I turned to drugs was to have friends. To fit in, you had to do drugs, and I grew up being made fun of a lot. Doing drugs, that didn't happen."
At Life-Line, not only was he required to give up pot and cocaine, he had to hand over his shoes. "It's a precaution," says Andrew, "so you won't run away."
Youths from ages 12 to 19 attend school every morning at the center, then spend the afternoon in group therapy, talking about their destructive behavior and learning new ways to change. For the first several months, they go home each night with other teens who are further along in the program.
"Being with kids like me, I've learned to open up and be honest," says Katrina, who was having terrible fights with her mother and getting straight F's at school. "I didn't used to respect myself or my family. Now, I know I caused a lot of pain."
With help from counselors like Lyle, she and her Life-Line friends are slowly repairing those torn relationships.
"They look at me and see it's really possible to have a new life," says Lyle, who once spent time in juvenile detention for shoplifting and drug use.
After making the commitment to get off drugs as a high school senior, Lyle gave up his old friends, even though it meant eating lunch alone at school and dealing with constant put-downs.
"It's the toughest thing I've ever done," he says, tears spilling from his eyes. "But today, my friends are in jail and I'm here. If I made it, other kids can too. Faith in yourself is what it takes."
Have a story? Let's hear it over lunch. E-mail your name, phone number and what you'd like to talk about to freelunch@desnews.com. You can also write to me at the Deseret Morning News, P.O. Box 1257, Salt Lake City, UT 84110.