TEANECK, N.J. — When Henry Hali's children were young, he had a rule about Christmas gifts: no toy guns. "People with guns, it makes me very nervous," he said in an interview at his home here. "These things were not in our household."
His children eventually saw many real guns while living with their mother in the West African nation of Liberia. They saw small boys fire large weapons during a civil war that lasted 14 years and killed at least 200,000 people. The war ended in 2003, and conditions have improved. A new president of Liberia was elected last month.
These days, the Hali family is prospering in the United States. Most prominent is Henry Hali's son Tamba, a defensive end for Penn State who was named to several all-American football teams.
But one important detail is unfinished. Hali's mother, Rachel Keita, who never married Henry Hali, remains in Liberia and wants to rejoin her children. During the war, she was wounded by gunfire in one of her knees. More recently, she spent time in a hospital with a fever.
Should all occur ideally, Keita could meet Hali and his three New Jersey-based siblings for the first time since 1994 when Penn State plays in the Orange Bowl against Florida State on Jan. 3 in Miami. At the least, the family would like to arrange a reunion before next year, when Tamba hopes to begin a National Football League career.
For now, Hali and his mother talk occasionally by cell phone, an improvement from the war years, when they shared little communication.
"She was sick; she's doing a little better," Hali said. "All she says to me is, 'I just want to be able to relax, Tamba. I don't want to do anything anymore.' She wants to be more concerned about little things instead of protecting herself and guarding herself."
Hali shook his head while describing childhood memories. "People killed in front of me and shot; people lined up in a straight line, and they sprayed them," Hali said. "Just bodies over bodies. It was really horrible."
The fighting forced the emigration of four Hali siblings, who moved to live with Henry Hali in the United States in 1994. Henry had left Liberia in 1985 to live permanently in the United States. He is a science teacher who has lived and worked for 20 years in this suburb of New York, just west of the George Washington Bridge.
Partly because of Hali's athletic profile, influential people are working on the family's behalf to secure a visa to make the reunion possible. Sen. Rick Santorum, R-Pa., is involved in the effort. Penn State officials said they were aware of NCAA rules prohibiting undue influence on behalf of athletes.
Hali spoke with his mother before one of his best games, when he recorded four sacks against Wisconsin on Nov. 5. His mother has seen photographs of him playing but knows little about football. "It looks dangerous to her," Hali said. "I just told her to pray for me."
He keeps several pictures of her in his apartment. When not discussing his extraordinary circumstances, Hali comes across as an upbeat college student, albeit one who is 6 feet 3 inches and 264 pounds and a public figure likely to make a good living in professional sports.
A 22-year-old senior majoring in broadcast journalism, Hali has a girlfriend and friends like Michael Robinson, the Penn State quarterback. For class assignments, Hali makes short news documentaries.
Recent topics included the death of Rosa Parks and the use by campus police of the social networking Web site Facebook.com to identify students who ran on the field after a victory at Beaver Stadium.
Hali records his own rap songs, but he says he uses no lyrics about violence and exploitation of women. Instead, his compositions are about romance and love. "Girly songs," he said.
When asked to recite his lyrics, Hali giggled in a high voice, blushed and politely declined. But, he added: "The kids love my songs. I put them on CD, and I give them to the kids on the team."
He developed his considerable verbal skills in an unorthodox way. Because war prevented early schooling, Hali did not start reading and writing until age 10. His father bought him "Hooked on Phonics" tapes, and they helped. Hali speaks in an accent that mostly reflects his time spent in North Jersey and partly reveals his childhood in West Africa.
Hali acknowledges that his grammar is not flawless, but he shows no shyness about expressing his thoughts with clarity. In a news release sent out by Penn State, Hali wrote on the back of his picture in his own hand that he "fell in love with football" at Teaneck High, where his father teaches.
"The people who knows about college football calls me an All-American," Hali wrote. "Kids from many states and many countries at Penn State call me a friend. I call myself very, very blessed."
Hali comes from a complex, blended family. His older half-brother, also named Tamba, is 33 years old, and the younger Tamba described him as "like a father to me." He persuaded young Tamba not to join the fighting in Liberia. He also set an example in New Jersey. "No bling-bling," the older Tamba said.
Also in New Jersey are a half-brother, Saah, 23, and a sister, Kumba, 19.
Another half-brother was killed during the war in Liberia, found dead in a well. Another half-sister lives with Keita. Hali's father, who is married, now screens agents and financial planners who knock on his son's hotel doors, call his son's cell phone and send his son e-mail messages.
He said his son's employment potential in the NFL should weigh in favor of Keita's ultimate immigration, because he would have a way to help support her. Many experts predict Hali will be a first-round pick in the draft this April.
But Gil Brandt, a former Dallas Cowboys director of player personnel who works for NFL.com, said pro scouts wondered what position Hali should play. His size makes him somewhat small for a defensive end and somewhat large for a linebacker. But Hali has adjusted before. For his first two years at Penn State, he played tackle and carried 20 more pounds.
Another major alteration came in his hair. Hali used to wear it long and braided, and other players followed his style. After coach Joe Paterno complained, Hali cut his hair short and said his teammates followed his example. That pleased Paterno, who regularly gushes about Hali.
Brandt compared Hali to the former boxing champion Jake LaMotta. "He's a very good athlete," Brandt said. "He was a basketball player in high school. He plays with a sense of urgency. He's relentless."
Although four sacks of Badgers quarterback John Stocco was the statistical high mark of Hali's season, his exclamation point came against Ohio State on Oct. 8. In a 17-10 victory over the Buckeyes on a giddy Saturday night in Happy Valley, Hali ended Ohio State's final threat by tackling quarterback Troy Smith.
The ball fell from Smith's hands, and the Lions recovered. A newspaper photograph showed Smith appearing to stand on his head, like a spinning top.
"It feels good," Hali said of the sack. "The more sacks you get, the better you feel."
Reflecting on his overall outlook as he approached yet another major transition in his young life, Hali said, "I'm glad to be in the position I'm in right now."