There is one really, really good thing about NBC's TV movie "Hercules."
Unlike so many dreadful Robert Halmi productions that preceded it, this one is only three hours long instead of four or six or eight. Which means Halmi's latest abomination will be gone in a single night (Monday, 7-10 p.m., Ch. 5).
Muddled, violent, ridiculous, dumb — this is less an action flick than an ancient Greek soap opera. And a really stupid one with bad special effects and laughable makeup.
"I promise you this is not like any 'Hercules' that has been produced before," said director Roger Young. "This is not a cartoon. This is a heavy, psychological drama."
So ... I shouldn't have laughed out loud all those times while I was watching it?
It's hard to understand what Halmi & Co. were thinking. (But this is, after all, the guy who rewrote the Bible in his miniseries "Noah's Ark.") British actor Paul Telfer affects an American accent to play Hercules . . . but other British actors (including Timothy Dalton, who plays Hercules' stepfather) do not. Huh?
That's but a minor complaint in a movie with major problems. Not the least of which is that it's just a big snooze.
Telfer obviously got the part because of his muscles, not because of his talent. But then actors who have, at least at times, demonstrated they have talent don't display any here. If Sean Astin (who plays Linus), Leelee Sobieski (Deianeira) and Dalton (Amphitryon) weren't embarrassed while they were making "Hercules," they will be when they see it. It's awful.
E-mail: pierce@desnews.com