Happy New Year! Before making predictions for 2006, we want to take one more look back at 2005. Because we are far too lazy to provide an in-depth analysis of the meaning of the year's political events, we are instead offering insights through the time-honored method of fabricated annual awards. The awards, nominees and winners are as follows:
What Have You Done for Me Lately Award. Honors the best evidence that involvement in the Huntsman campaign does not guarantee unconditional employment. The three nominees are:
Huntsman campaign director and former chief of staff Jason Chaffetz, who was willing to make tough decisions but unable to build legislative and strategic alliances.
Top level campaign adviser, transition director and fund-raiser Greg Hopkins, a good friend of the governor who was hired by a controversial client.
Campaign director of research and former Commerce Department director Russell Skousen, a loyal Huntsman soldier who fired Roger Ball and actually believed the Legislature would increase his salary. (Judges' note: All three nominees submitted their resignations.)
The winner: Greg Hopkins. A respected and experienced political operative, Hopkins was a key insider to the Huntsman campaign and administration. He assumed the role as chief fund-raiser for a governor who is obviously uncomfortable soliciting donations. Unfortunately for Hopkins, the news media provided extensive coverage of Hopkins' contract to provide federal government relations services to Envirocare of Utah, just when Envirocare was seeking state approval for expansion. Although the relationship with Envirocare (which has new owners) did not violate any ethical guidelines, Huntsman did not want any confusion about his strong stance against waste disposal in Utah. As a result, Hopkins graciously severed formal ties with the governor (fund raising and director for Huntsman's Utah Policy Partnership). Strong proof that radioactivity is contagious.
The Whispering in the Ear Award. Honors the Utahn who hears a little whispering in his ear and believes it is the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing the Hallelujah Chorus, to paraphrase the late Wayne Owens. (Judges' note: Normally, several nominees would be eligible for this award, but this year one person was so outstanding in this category that he deserves the award without pretense of competition.)
Runaway Winner: Rep. Steve Urquhart, who, no doubt, received a lot of quiet encouragement to challenge U.S. Sen. Orrin Hatch. But many of those whispering in Urquhart's ear weren't willing to go public and few backed up their whisperings with significant campaign contributions. While Urquhart legitimately detected a feeling that Hatch had become a creature of Washington and had lost touch with Utah, his campaign seriously underestimated the difficulty of taking on a 30-year powerful senator who is a fearsome campaigner with more than $2 million in the bank and plenty of time to deal with his shortcomings.
Always a Bridesmaid, but Never a Bride Award. Honors the tax proposal that receives a tremendous amount of discussion but will never be implemented. The four nominees are:
Elimination of the food sales tax.
Elimination of the corporate franchise tax.
Establishment of a true flat tax without deductions for mortgages or charitable contributions.
Jones-Mascaro proposal to bolster education funding by tweaking personal income tax progressivity and child exemptions.
Winner: All four proposals. None will be fully approved any time in the near future.
If You Can't Beat 'Em, Work for Them Award. Honors Democrats and politicos with undetermined party affiliations who win high-profile appointments in a Republican administration. Nominees are:
Former Sen. Ron Allen, appointed to the Public Service Commission.
Former Murray city chief of staff D'Arcy Dixon Pignanelli, appointed director of Administrative Services.
Pamela Atkinson, Utah's most prominent advocate for low-income and homeless people.
Winner: Pamela Atkinson. She was co-director of the transition team, and no one seems to have better access to the governor than Atkinson. (Judges' note: Atkinson has been brilliant in obfuscating her political preferences, but we believe she is a devout member of the Wales National Party.)
Titles Are Meaningless, Actions Are Everything Award. Honors an elected official attempting to act in the capacity of governor regardless of actual position. Nominees are:
House Speaker Greg Curtis, who knows all the ropes and levers of state government and is not afraid to use them.
Senate President John Valentine, just trying to provide a little adult supervision to the whole process.
Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr., always a diplomat, still learning how to wield the power of the executive branch.
Lt. Gov. Gary Herbert, doing some heavy lifting with his substantial assignments.
Winner: It's a draw! All four of them are trying to be governor (how lucky we are; the other 49 states just have one governor). We do believe, however, that Huntsman is climbing the steep learning curve and will emerge more in 2006 as the top dog.
Things Could Be Worse Award. Highlights that activity that best demonstrates why Utah's Legislature must remain part-time. The nominees are:
The parking problem at the Capitol.
More time means more lobbyists.
The Tax Reform Task Force.
Winner: Hands down, the task force. Clear proof that more meetings, more debate, more testimony from experts doesn't produce clear and better results.
The Laughing Zealot Award. Honors the legislative crusader who is able to withstand personal criticism and chuckle at himself/herself. Sadly, although there are a number of self-righteous Democrats, none have demonstrated a clear ability to be self-effacing. The nominees are:
Rep. LaVar Christensen
Sen. Curtis Bramble
Sen. Chris Buttars
Winner: Bramble has taken a lot of punches, pokes and digs from a variety of sources (including this column) in good humor.
Republican LaVarr Webb was policy deputy to Gov. Mike Leavitt and Deseret News managing editor. He now is a political consultant and lobbyist. E-mail: lwebb@exoro.com. Democrat Frank Pignanelli is Salt Lake attorney, lobbyist and political adviser. A former candidate for Salt Lake mayor, Pignanelli served 10 years in the Utah House of Representatives, six years as House minority leader. Pignanelli's spouse, D'Arcy Dixon Pignanelli, is executive director of the state Department of Administrative Services in the Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr. administration. E-mail: frankp@xmission.com.