You either get them or you don't. That is, certain movies, or movie performances.
For example, I still don't get "Napoleon Dynamite," local filmmaker Jared Hess' smash-hit comedy about a high school misfit.
Jon Heder's performance as the title character irritated me more than tickled my funny bone.
Hess' follow-up, "Nacho Libre," features another polarizing performance, this time by Jack Black as the title character, a Mexican monk-turned-wrestler.
Judging by some of my e-mails about that film — and about Black's role in last year's remake of "King Kong" — it seems that more than a few people don't get him.
I do have to admit that I find Black amusing, at least in small doses. But I wonder if he and Heder can have lengthy film careers when, so far, they've been such one-note actors — especially local boy Heder.
His performances in "Just Like Heaven" and "The Benchwarmers" seem to indicate he's content to keep playing minor-chord variations on his "Napoleon" character.
Normally I'd be tempted to say most of that has to do with the writing and direction on those films, but I did see his performance as guest host on "Saturday Night Live," and Heder played the same doofus character in every skit. On the other hand, it isn't like the writing on that show is top-notch anymore.
There are a number of actors who have made film careers for themselves, despite their lack of range.
Such as Sharon Stone.
Or Demi Moore — what did anyone ever see in her? (Er, aside from Bruce Willis and Ashton Kutcher, of course.)
Or Andy Garcia. I have yet to see him give a performance better than Paul Walker and Ben Affleck, who have certainly taken bigger critical drubbings.
TALENT OR JUST EGO? Speaking of critical targets, Hilary Duff has taken her lumps. And like alleged comedian Rob Schneider — who has publicly feuded with Chicago Sun-Times film critic Roger Ebert — she's apparently taking her less-than-favorable notices to heart.
The "Cheaper by the Dozen" co-star has been engaging in a war of words with New York-based journalist Stephen Holden, who has referred to her as "talent-challenged," among other things.
Holden is a well-respected entertainment writer for the New York Times, but Duff singled him out, telling Elle Magazine that "he doesn't really fit (my) demographic. So I could really care less."
Apparently she cares more than she'd like to admit, though, as she added, "Look at me, and look at where he is — sorry!"
Now as a journalist, I certainly don't believe that film critics are above reproach. And some of Holden's comments about Duff do come off as a little mean-spirited.
But for a celebrity to criticize a critic by name does seem ridiculous.
Especially when taken to the lengths of Schneider's supposed sparring with Ebert, whom he called "fat" — and worse.
E-mail: jeff@desnews.com